媽媽的雙手

母親的心是一個深淵，在它的最深處你總會得到寬恕。

—奧諾雷·德·巴爾扎克（法國作家）

Track 9

by Louisa Godissart McQuillen

翻譯：箐舞

文字難度·

Night after night， she came to1）tuck me in， even long after my childhood years. Following her2）longstanding custom， she’d3）lean down and push my long hair out of the way， then kiss my forehead.

I don’t remember when it first started annoying me—her hands pushing my hair that way. But it did annoy me， for they felt work-4）worn and rough against my young skin. Finally， one night，I shouted out at her， “Don’t do that anymore—your hands are too rough！” She didn’t say anything. But never again did my mother close out my day with that familiar expression of love.

Time after time， with the passing years， my thoughts returned to that night. I missed my mother’s hands， missed her goodnight kiss on my forehead. Sometimes the5）incident seemed very close， sometimes far away. But always it6）lurked in the back of my mind.

Well， the years have passed， and I’m not a little girl anymore. Mom is in her mid-seventies， and those hands I once thought to be so rough are still doing things for me and my family. She’s been our family doctor； she cooks the best fried chicken in the world； she can get7）stains out of blue jeans...

Now， my own children are grown and gone. Mom no longer has Dad， and on special8）occasions I would spend the night with her. It was late on Thanksgiving Eve， as I slept in the bedroom of my youth，a familiar hand9）hesitantly run across my face to brush the hair from my forehead. Then a kiss，10）ever so11）gently， touched my brow.

In my memory， for tens of thousands of times， I recalled the night my young voice complained， “Don’t do that anymore—your hands are too rough！” Catching Mom’s hand， I12）blurted out how sorry I was for that night. I thought she’d remember， as I did. But Mom didn’t know what I was talking about. She had forgotten—and forgiven—long ago.

That night， I fell asleep with a new13）appreciation for my gentle mother and her14）caring hands. And the15）guilt that I had carried around for so long was nowhere to be found.

參考譯文

夜復一夜，媽媽總是過來幫我蓋被子，即便我早已不是小孩子了。這是媽媽長久以來的習慣—俯下身，撥開我臉上的長發(fā)，然后親吻我的前額。

記不清是從什么時候開始，我對她撥開我頭發(fā)的這個行為感到很不耐煩。但的確，我討厭她用那雙長期操勞的、粗糙的手觸碰我嬌嫩的皮膚。終于，在一個夜晚，我沖她大喊：“不要再這樣做了，你的手太粗糙了！”她什么也沒說，卻再也沒有用這種我熟悉的愛意表達方式為我的一天畫上句號。

這些年來，我總是一次又一次地回想起那個夜晚。我想念媽媽的雙手，想念她印在我前額上的晚安吻。那個夜晚有時候似乎近在咫尺，有時候又似乎遙不可及，但它始終潛藏在我的腦海深處。

時光飛逝，我再也不是個小女孩了。媽媽如今已經(jīng)大約七十五歲了，而那雙我曾認為極其粗糙的手仍然在為我和我的家庭忙碌著。她一直是我們的家庭醫(yī)生；她能做出世界上最美味的炸雞；她能去除牛仔褲上的污漬……

如今，我自己的孩子也已經(jīng)長大成人，離開了我的身邊。媽媽不再有爸爸的陪伴，所以在某些特殊的情況下，我會花一整晚的時間陪伴在她左右。在感恩節(jié)前夕的深夜，當我在兒時的臥室里睡著時，一只熟悉的手遲疑地撫過我的臉龐，撥開了我前額的頭發(fā)，然后一個極其輕柔的吻印在了我的眉毛上。

在我的記憶里，曾成千上萬次地再現(xiàn)那晚我稚嫩的抱怨聲：“不要再這樣做了，你的手太粗糙了！”我一把抓住媽媽的手，一股腦地說出我對那晚的愧疚。我以為她和我一樣都記得那晚的事兒，但媽媽不明白我在說什么。她已經(jīng)忘記了—原諒我了—在很久以前。

那天晚上，我?guī)е鴮寢尩男抡J識—她的溫柔以及她那雙對我呵護備至的手—安然入睡。而長久以來壓在我心頭的負罪感也隨之煙消云散。

1） tuck sb. in 為某人蓋好被子

2） longstanding ［'l??'st?nd??］ adj. 長久存在的

3） lean down 彎腰，俯下身來

4） worn ［w??n］ adj. 用舊的，磨損的

5） incident ［'?ns?d?nt］ n. 事件

6） lurk ［lз?k］ v. 潛藏

7） stain ［ste?n］ n. 污點，污漬

8） occasion ［?'ke???n］ n. 特殊場合，特殊時刻

9） hesitantly ［'hez?t?ntl?］ adv. 猶豫地，遲疑地

10） ever so 極其，非常

11） gently ［'d?entl?］ adv. 輕柔地

12） blurt out 脫口而出

13） appreciation ［?pri???'e???n］ n. 欣賞，理解

14） caring ［'ke?r??］ adj. 關懷的

15） guilt ［g?lt］ n. 罪行，內(nèi)疚

M■her’s Hands