文/唐老雅

常常有烤鴨問我：到底什么樣的雅思作文可以得到6分，什么樣的作文能得7分？答案當然可能是很復雜的。但如果排除審題偏差、內容跑題這類問題后，我們大約可以這樣來判斷雅思作文6分和7分的區(qū)別：6分作文要求句子語法基本正確，沒有很多語法錯誤，更不能出現(xiàn)讓讀者無法看懂句子意思的語法錯誤，如果出現(xiàn)了這類錯誤，那么作文就很可能降格到5分段；同時，如果出現(xiàn)了過多小語法錯誤，即使文章能讓人讀懂，也有可能給判在5分段。而7分作文中，即使是小的語法錯誤也需要避免，同時句式還要表現(xiàn)出一定的靈活性和多樣性。這樣看來，在雅思作文中，決定能否跨過6分的關鍵是句子的正確性，決定能否跨過7分的關鍵則是句子的正確性和多樣性。句子的正確性是寫作成功的第一步，但很多烤鴨不斷在寫作內容上下功夫，但卻屢屢在句子寫作上犯錯誤，從而失去獲得更高分的可能性。本次專欄文章，老雅想通過比較漢語和英語的區(qū)別，指出由漢語引起的三類常見英語語法錯誤，以幫助各位烤鴨發(fā)現(xiàn)句子錯誤的根源及修改方式。

人們常常說，漢語是意合語言，而英語是形合語言。這是什么意思呢？其實很簡單，漢語是靠意義、靠感覺來搭建的語言，而英語是靠形式、靠語法規(guī)范來搭建的語言。這種差異就決定了漢語和英語在句子寫作中有如下三個主要差異：

一、漢語沒有詞形變化，而英語有詞形變化。

相信英語初學者都曾對英語動詞的時態(tài)變化心有余悸，同樣一個動詞，用于一般現(xiàn)在時、過去時、將來時等時，其形態(tài)就要發(fā)生變化，而漢語會永遠用同一個形態(tài)。比如，我每天去上學/我昨天去上學/我明天去上學，漢語都是“去上學”，可英語就要分別對應go to school、went to school、will go to school三種不同形態(tài)。這種詞形差異還體現(xiàn)在代詞、情態(tài)動詞、比較級、主謂一致等方面。例如：

誤 I had a look at my watch and I knew what will happen.（時態(tài)誤用）

改 I had a look at my watch and I knew what would happen.

誤 The eating habit of Chinese people have changed dramatically in the past decade.（主謂不一致）

改 The eating habit of Chinese people has changed dramatically in the past decade.

誤 Whether one enjoys or resents advertisements, we are actually inundated with it every hour of the day.（代詞誤用）

改 Whether one enjoys or resents them, he/she is actually inundated with advertisements every hour of the day.

誤 In a word, if we have no TV, we may lose something which bring us happy.（語態(tài)誤用）

改 In a word, if we had no TV, we might lose something which brings us happiness.

二、漢語句法可以比較隨意，而英語句法通常比較嚴格。

一個完整的英語句子，必須有主語、謂語這兩個基本成分，否則就會被稱為殘缺句（broken sentences），而漢語則主要依靠感覺，對主語謂語的結構要求沒有那么高。比如：“保護環(huán)境，一定要提高意識。”——讀到這個句子，我們中國人會覺得語法沒有什么問題，我們也不會去追問，到底是誰“一定要提高意識”，我們憑感覺就知道說話者到底在說誰，因此不必明確出來。但英語就不一樣，如果你將那句漢語直接翻譯為“protect environment, must promote awareness”，那一定會被認為是嚴重的語法錯誤。那么，到底怎么翻譯這句呢？其實，人們經常說漢語是一門隱晦的語言或詩性的語言，其原因就在這里：明明“保護環(huán)境”表示就是目的，也就是“為了保護環(huán)境”，但我們就是不用“為了”這個連接詞，讓你去猜猜猜！明明“一定要提高意識”肯定是指“我們”或“你們”，甚至“我們大家”，但也不明確說出來，讓你去猜猜猜！因此，任何一個漢語句子，我們都可以做出多種不同的解釋，就是由漢語內在的這種隱晦性或詩性所決定的。如果把上面那句翻譯成英語，就需要明確出“為了保護環(huán)境”，就需要明確出“誰一定要提高意識”，這樣一來，英語就把漢語的很多可能性變成了只有一種確定的可能了（比如：In order to protect environment, we must promote our awareness.）。此外，英語句法對句子中主語和謂語的搭配要求也相當嚴格。舉例如下：

誤 But the science and technology also is a two-edge sword, if uses unsuitably will bring the suffering of destruction to people.（破碎句）

改 But science and technology is also a double-edged sword, which might be destructive to human being if used improperly.

誤 In order to get a good mark, it took me much time, when I didn’t have classes this weekdays, to get ready for this exam.（邏輯主語不匹配）

改 In order to get a good mark, I spend much of my spare time getting ready for this exam.

誤 China develops very fast which could supply so many chances of jobs for people that a few of people have several jobs at the same time, and they must improve their efficiency including walking in the road.（漢語句型的直接翻譯）

改 As China develops rapidly, so many new job opportunities are opened up that some people can take several jobs at the same time, which makes it necessary for them to minimize their commuting time.

誤 Psychological health let us have good individual character including steady feeling, gentle disposition, and strong will, easy to get along with other person, can adapt oneself to complicated circumstances as well as have good relation with other people.（列舉成分的形式不統(tǒng)一）

改 Mental health gives us desirable personalities such as stable feeling,gentle disposition and strong will, and makes it easy for us to get along with others, to adapt ourselves to the complicated circumstances as well as maintain favorable interpersonal relationships.

三、漢語可以用流水句，英語不可以。

漢語中，兩個獨立句子只要有關系，就可以用逗號連接，且不需要任何表示兩句關系的連接詞，而在英語中，這兩個句子若用逗號連接，就必須有表示兩句關系的連接詞，否則必須用句號，若既無連接詞，又用逗號連接，就構成了不符合英語語法規(guī)范的“流水句”。中國學生由于受到漢語影響，“流水句”問題屢見不鮮，屢教不改，是英語教師比較頭痛的難題。比如中國學生作文中常見的一句：We should work together to fight air pollution, this is very important.（我們必須團結起來與空氣污染作斗爭，這一點非常重要。）這樣的英語就是受到漢語意合語法的影響，兩個獨立的句子用逗號相連，而且沒有連接詞。怎么修改呢？很簡單，就是把它們分成兩句，或者把其中一句變成從屬句，即：①We should work together to fight air pollution. This is very important. 或者②We should work together to fight air pollution, which is very important. 再或③It is very important that we work together to fight air pollution. 請看更多例句：

誤 As China entered WTO, the cost of a car is decreasing in these years,many families could buy and use a family car.（流水句）

改 As China has become a member of WTO, the cost of a car is keeping lowering down in recent years so that many families could afford a private car.

誤 Health is the most important factor in our lives, we can lose money and authority, but we can’t lose health.（流水句）

改 Health is the most important factor in our life. We can lose money and power, but we can not lose health.