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        My School Life

        2024-10-21 00:00:00祖瑞
        初中生世界·八年級(jí) 2024年10期
        關(guān)鍵詞:概括性校園生活秋雨

        Pre-reading

        1. What’s your school life like?

        2. Do you know what school life in the UK is like?

        Going to a British high school for one year was a very enjoyable and exciting experience for me. I was very happy with the school hours in Britain because school starts around 9 a.m. and ends about 3:30 p.m. This means I could get up an hour later than usual, as schools in China usually begin at 8 a.m.

        On the first day, all of the new students attended an assembly in the school hall. I sat next to a boy whose name was Daniel. We soon became best friends. During the assembly, the headmaster told us about the rules of the school. He also told us that the best way to earn respect was to devote ourselves to study and achieve high grades.

        I had many teachers in the past year. Mr. Heywood, my class teacher, was very helpful. My favorite teacher was Miss Burke, and I loved the lessons that she gave in English Literature. In our class there were 28 students. This is about the average size for British schools. We had to move to different classrooms for different classes. We also had different students in some classes, so it was a struggle for me to remember all the faces and names.

        I found that the homework was a bit challenging for me at first, because all the homework was in English. I felt lucky, as all my teachers gave me much encouragement and I enjoyed all my subjects: English, History, English Literature, Computer Science, Maths, Science, PE, Art, Cooking and French.

        My English improved a lot, as I used English every day and spent an hour each day reading English books in the library. I also had an extra French class on Tuesday evenings. Cooking was really fun as I learnt how to buy, prepare and cook food. At the end of the term we held a class party and we had to cook something. I was glad that all my classmates were fond of the cake that I made.

        Students at that school have to study Maths, English and Science, but can stop studying some subjects if they do not like them, for example, History and French. They can choose other subjects like Art and Computer Science, or languages such as Spanish and German. In the Art class that I took, I made a small sculpture. Though it did not look very beautiful when it was finished, I still liked it very much.

        British food is very different. There were lots of 25 options including bread and butter, chicken pie and puddings, but I still missed my mum’s cooking! British people like eating dessert at the end of their main meal. After lunch, we usually played on the school field. Sometimes I played football with Daniel and his friends. Sometimes I just relaxed under a tree or sat on the grass.

        After school, there were many clubs to join. The one that attracted me most was the Rugby Club. We played once a week, and it was great fun. Also, I enjoyed acting in the Theatre Club. I still have photos of myself acting in William Shakespeare’s A Midsummer Night’s Dream. Joining clubs was a great way to meet British students and make friends with them.

        I am glad to have the opportunity to experience this different way of life. I met some great people and learnt a lot about school life in the UK. Daniel and his friends were very nice. I can’t wait for Daniel to visit China!

        While-reading

        If you have a chance to study at a British secondary school as an exchange student, what will you prepare for? Discuss with your partner.

        Post-readingIn

        the last paragraph, the writer thinks his school life in the UK is great fun. He can’t wait to invite Daniel to visit China. Please write about your school life to tell Daniel.

        原文呈現(xiàn)

        My School Life

        I’ve been in junior high school for a year. Today, I want to share my school life with you.

        My school has a beautiful environment and is near Niushou Mountain. The students here work hard all the time, and the teachers are very helpful. Because of this, we have a great atmosphere for studying.

        My classmates are very friendly. I make a lot of friends, so I never feel lonely at school. We often discuss problems and solve them together. They help me a lot.

        Every morning, we have morning exercises, which help us get ready for the day. We also have PE lessons that make us strong and healthy. Besides that, we have Art, Music, and other fun classes.

        We can also take part in various activities. My favorite is the Love Charity Sale. During the time, I can buy all kinds of things or sell something. The money we make from selling goes to poor areas. After this event, I feel the joy of sharing.

        Sometimes we have tests to check how much we’ve learned. I think it’s a good chance to encourage ourselves to do better.

        In the next two years, I think I will have even more good memories.

        開(kāi)頭部分缺乏概括性,導(dǎo)致后文各段間的銜接較弱,比較分散??梢园凑铡靶@中的人——日常學(xué)習(xí)——特別活動(dòng)”的主線重新梳理文章結(jié)構(gòu)。

        全文重點(diǎn)展現(xiàn)了文體方面的學(xué)習(xí)內(nèi)容,但是占據(jù)大部分校園生活的文化學(xué)習(xí)被一筆帶過(guò),主次顛倒。此外,要寫(xiě)出自己的收獲與感受。

        放在此處略顯突兀,與上文脫節(jié)。

        升格展示

        My School Life

        My first year in junior high school was filled with rich experiences. I’d like to share with you my school life, including the people, daily studies, and special activities.

        My school has a beautiful environment and is near Niushou Mountain. The students here work hard all the time, and the teachers are very helpful. My classmates are so friendly and welcoming, that we quickly turn into a harmonious group. Because of this, we have a great atmosphere for studying.

        Every day, we start with fun morning exercises that give us energy and get us ready for school. We study Maths, Science, and languages to make our brains smarter. But we also have Art, Music, and PE classes to make us creative and healthy. All these different subjects keep us interested and happy.

        Outside of class, our school has lots of fun activities. My favorite is the Love Charity Sale. During the time, I can buy all kinds of things or sell something. The money we make from selling goes to poor areas. When I take part, I feel happy and proud because I’m helping others. It shows me how good it feels to give back.

        I’m really excited for the next two years of junior high school. I know there will be lots of new things to do, new friends to make, and new knowledge to learn. Every day, I feel sure that my school life will be full of fun, and memories I’ll never forget.

        (江蘇省南京市將軍山中學(xué) 潘皓軒;指導(dǎo)教師 劉秋雨 祖瑞)

        綜合點(diǎn)評(píng)

        小作者以“學(xué)校的老師與同學(xué)——學(xué)校的日常學(xué)習(xí)——特別的校園活動(dòng)”為主線描述了自己豐富多彩的校園生活,點(diǎn)面結(jié)合,詳略得當(dāng)。升格文結(jié)構(gòu)更為清晰,情感態(tài)度更為鮮明。文章中的種種描述都彰顯了小作者對(duì)學(xué)校生活的喜愛(ài)與贊美。

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