THE HOSPITAL LABYRINTH

Navigating the lines, departments, and bad news of Chinese hospitals

如何去醫(yī)院看??？

BY SUN JlAHUl (孫佳慧)

We’ve all been there, the labyrinth of Chinese health-care. In truth, it’s a marvel of logistics, but this impression changes the moment you get a stomach ache or feel a bit dizzy and realize it’s time to navigate Chinese hospital bureaucracy. You arrive at 8:00 in the morning, fnding a long and snaking queue outside the hospital, flled with the seriously ill and those just there for checkups. As your heart sinks, you join the line. An hour or more passes, and it’s fnally your turn to register. Here the maze begins: Which department? What registration do you prefer? Do you have your card? Your passport? Did you bring your medical records? And of course, you didn’t save anything from your last visit because, hey, you’re going to live forever, right?

Obviously, seeing a doctor in China is not exactly a piece of cake. Well, take it easy, hold your hot water tight, and let’s start at the beginning.

REGlSTRATlON lS GOOD FOR THE SOUL

First of all, you need to judge whether you will go to the general outpatient department (門診部ménzhěnbù) or the emergency department (急診部 jízhěnbù). The emergency department is obviously supposed to deal with emergency situations, and if you’ve got a broken leg, we’re very pleased you’ve chosen to read this article as you writhe in pain, but you might want to get to the hospital instead. The registration process for emergencies is faster.

If it’s not an emergency, you’ll fnd yourself in the general outpatient department. Keep in mind that, in China, you can always count on an incredibly long queue whenever you go for public services, so remember to get up early. How early? Think of what you think is early and then get up earlier than that, say fve or six in the morning. Or, there’s always the option of registering via phone or online several days before you actually go. But even this won’t save you from the dreaded lines.

As you arrive at the hall, there is usually an information desk (導(dǎo)醫(yī)臺 dǎoyītái) to ask where you should register, which is really important.

Patient: Excuse me, which department should I go to?

Qǐngwèn wǒ yīnggāi guà shénme kē?

請問我應(yīng)該掛什么科?

Staff: Well, how do you feel right now? Nǐ nǎlǐ bù shūfu?

你哪里不舒服？

Patient: I feel dizzy, have a cough, and perhaps a fever.

CHlNA HAS A TENDENCY TOWARD OVERPRESCRlBlNG PlLLS, POWDERS, ANTlBlOTlCS, lNJECTlONS, AND TRADlTlONAL MEDlClNE

Wǒ tóuyūn, késou, kěnéng hái fāshāo.

我頭暈，咳嗽，可能還發(fā)燒。

Staff: You should go to the Respiratory Department. Have you brought your medical records with you?

Nǐ yīnggāi guà hūxīkē. Nǐ dài bìnglì le ma?

你應(yīng)該掛呼吸科。你帶病歷了嗎？

Patient: I didn't bring them. Méi dài.

沒帶。

Staff: Then get a new one at the registration office, please. Qǐng zài guàhàochù mǎi běn xīn de ba.

請?jiān)趻焯柼庂I本新的吧。

Now, you’re well on your way to being treated, but registration offers yet another hurdle when the nurse says:

What kind of registration do you want? Nǐ yào guà shénme hào?

你要掛什么號？

Confused? Relax, the nurse is just asking if you want the general outpatient service (普通號 pǔtōnghào), expert outpatient service (專家號zhuānjiāhào), or specialized disease outpatient service (特需門診號tèxū ménzhěnhào). Of course, the registration fee changes accordingly. Often, the general one costs three to fve yuan, while the expert is more than ten yuan. And, sometimes there is a specialist outpatient service for dozens to hundreds of RMB.

Normally, the general outpatient department is enough for your runof-the-mill illnesses. In the worst case scenario, they send you to one of the other specialized departments.

WHAT’S UP DOC?

You’ve got your registration, congrats. You also have a new medical book and a number. Here, you need to walk to the waiting room just outside the consulting room door.

Surprise! More waiting. Then, you see your number appear on the screen, so you stand up excitedly and rush eagerly to the consulting room—only to see a crowd of people there chattering noisily around the doctor.

It’s not a rare scene. Patients and their families tend to keep asking questions even after their consultation is over. So, on your behalf, you’d better break in and attract the doctor’s attention.

Hi, doctor, is it my turn?

Dàifu nínhǎo, yīnggāi dào wǒ le ba?

大夫您好，應(yīng)該到我了吧？

If you succeed, have a seat, and, as they say, the doctor will see you now. But, don’t get comfortable; someone is pretty likely to rudelyburst through the door with his or her examination results.

Doctor! I got my results!

Dàifu! Wǒ de huàyàn jiéguǒ chūlái le!

大夫！我的化驗(yàn)結(jié)果出來了!

The most you can hope for when this happens is that you have your pants on.

DOCTOR, DOCTOR, GlVE ME THE NEWS

If the doctor just prescribes some medicine, all you need to do is to pay the cashier and take the slip to the pharmacy. But, life is unfair and sometimes you need a bit more care.

Doctor: I think you need an IV-drip. Wǒ rènwéi nǐ xūyào dǎ diǎndī.

我認(rèn)為你需要打點(diǎn)滴。

Patient: Really? Is that really necessary?

Zhēn de ma? Bìxū dǎ ma?

真的嗎？必須打嗎？

Doctor : Well, you will recover faster with its help.

Dǎ diǎndī dehuà, nǐ huì huīfù de kuài yìdiǎnr.

打點(diǎn)滴的話，你會恢復(fù)得快一點(diǎn)兒。

Be warned, however, China has a tendency toward overprescribing pills, powders, antibiotics, injections, and traditional medicine. You never know, it might be negotiable.

Patient: I hate injections. Will it be okay if I just take the medicine?

Wǒ tǎoyàn dǎzhēn, zhǐ chī yào kěyǐ ma?

我討厭打針，只吃藥可以嗎？

Doctor: Uh…sure, if you insist.

èn……jìrán nǐ jiānchí dehuà, nà hǎo ba.

嗯……既然你堅(jiān)持的話，那好吧。

If your condition is not that simple, the doctor will write you a slip for more tests. Again, in China, remember this rule: always pay frst. So, say you need another test, the bad news is that it’s probably not going to happen soon; in fact, you’re probably going to have to come back another day.

Lo and behold, you get your results and bound off to see the doctor again with your lab results—and all the waiting, relatives, and barging patients it comes with. If you’re lucky, the answer will be clear, the doctor will give you your prescription and you can go on about your day. But, the results could be inconclusive and you will need to do some more tests.

Doctor: Your results are inconclusive. Nǐ de jiǎnchá jiéguǒ hái bù míngquè.

你的檢查結(jié)果還不明確。

Patient: Oh, no! Bú shì ba!

不是吧！

Doctor: You will need to come back on another day for blood tests.

Guò liǎng tiān zài lái yàn yíxià xiě ba.

過兩天再來驗(yàn)一下血吧。

If worse comes to worst, then you may have to be hospitalized, and that is a whole different can of worms.

Doctor: We will need to keep you for observation.

Nǐ de bìngqíng xūyào zhùyuàn guānchá.

你的病情需要住院觀察。

The payment method in the inpatient department (住院部 zhùyuànbù) is a little different. You need to prepay a certain amount of money, perhaps thousands of RMB. All of your expenses will then be deducted from your prepayment. You’ll get another doctor, different tests, and hopefully, you’ll get well soon.

If not, this last tip is an unpleasant one: bad news. Like it or not, going to the doctor means there’s something wrong, and if it’s something serious, you may hear your doctor say:

Did anyone come with you? Yǒu rén péi nǐ yìqǐ lái ma?

有人陪你一起來嗎？

Would you like me to talk with your family?

Xūyào wǒ gēn nǐ de jiārén tányitán ma?

需要我跟你的家人談一談嗎？

If you hear your doctor say this, you may want to brace yourself for some very bad news.

Well, hopefully you’ve made it out of your hospital nightmare. No country has healthcare fgured out perfectly, but in China, it can be cheap and effcient if you know how to work the system. The best way to make sure you don’t have to deal with all this is to remember to take care of your health. But, also remember that no one stays well forever, so be prepared.