Tara Coughlin age 17

塔蘭·考夫琳17歲

EVERY DAY is a learning process. Seven months ago I spent three days learning about a problem that has no clear， definite solution.The problem still waits; I have not solved it——yet.Isay\"yet\"becauseof what those three days taught me. The apparent insolubility of a problem is not a comfortable excuse to give in， but a call for fortitude in the struggle to achieve a solution.

I spent three days in August of 1999 in Philadelphia soup kitchens as part of a community outreach program organized by the Community Service Core.I am not a monument of piety.I was simply bored and looking to even out the score a little.I've never had to struggle for much; I was born into a wonderful family and a relatively secure financial situation.Others were born， and continue to be born， into less than nothing: poverty， drugs， prostitution.They don't deserve destitution any more than I deserve plenitude.

So for three days， I lived with about ten other volunteers in a parish-owned row home in northeast Philadelphia.There was one shower，little hot water，no beds，and no air conditioning. Sparse， but as temporary residence none of us minded much， especially when we witnessed the living conditions of the people we were there to help.During the day we served lunch at different kitchens.At night we split up to canvass downtown Philadelphia and tell the people on the street about shelters offering food and an escape from the heat.We talked to many people; some were grateful， others were angry， many were indifferent， a few were crazy. I listened and before I knew it， my thinking had changed.

I believe in the American Dream; if you work hard and make the most of what you have you can succeed.But how do you make the most of a cocaine addiction that began at age ten when the local dealer first got you hooked？ How do you succeed when you're kicked out of your house at age thirteen， picked up by a pimp on the street and forced into prostitution? If you have no family， where do you go after a maiming car accident puts you in the hospital for a month， you lose your job and you're left with bills your insurance doesn't cover？Those are only a few stories I heard during my three days of community service in one small section of my city.

When I decided to volunteer for this program it was not my intention to attempt to find a solution for poverty.I wanted to help some homeless people， feel good about myself， even a little self righteous， and move on， content that I had done my part in the war on poverty.The men， women， and children I spoke to made such detachment impossible.I couldn't make eye contact with these people without thinking: There has got to be a cure.This can't be it.There must be some simple solution that just hasn't occurred to anyone yet.I thought of nothing else. I strove to find the answer that was surely lurking somewhere in the recesses of my mind.The recesses proved barren; I could not solve the problem of poverty in my city after working in it and think about it unflaggingly for three days.

The problem remains.It confronts me every time another homeless person asks me for change on my way home.It's the coins jingling in the Styrofoam cup as I pass.It's the empty hand reaching out to me.It's the cardboard sign held up to my car window.So what do I do? I can't forget and I won't ignore.My own alternative is to hold this problem close， where every opportunity to chip away at it can be fully utilized.I know I will return to the kitchens， for I must keep contact with the concrete reality of poverty if I can ever hope to eradicate it.In the struggle to solve this massive dilemma I may one day come to the revelation that has eluded so many.Until then I have to keep going; in life there is no such thing as a simple solution.

每天都是一個學習過程。七個月前，我花了三天時間著重研究一個問題，這個問題沒有明確肯定的答案。問題依然沒有解決，我還是沒有找到準確答案。我用了“還是”一詞是因為那三天我學到了不少東西，一個問題明顯沒能解決并不能作為好的借口而罷手，它喚起了我堅忍不拔的毅力去完成解決問題的任務。

1999年8月，我參加了社區(qū)服務中心組織的社區(qū)幫助活動，在費城的流動廚房呆了三天。我并非虔誠，只是覺得有點無聊，希望能將自己的評分扯平一些。我根本沒有必要太爭強好勝，因為我生在一個幸福美滿的家庭，有相對穩(wěn)定的經(jīng)濟基礎。其他一些人則生在幾乎一無所有的家庭，只有貧窮、毒品和賣淫。他們不應該那么窮，缺吃少穿的，而我卻享受著豐裕的生活。

整整三天，我和其余十來個志愿者住在費城東北部的一幢聯(lián)立房屋中，那是教區(qū)所轄的房屋，里面有一個淋浴，幾乎沒什么熱水，沒有床，沒有空調。那里什么都沒有，可是作為臨時住所，我們誰都不怎么介意，特別是在看到我們想要幫助的那些人的生活狀況之后。白天，我們在不同的流動廚房給人們供應午餐，夜晚，我們分散開到費城的鬧市區(qū)去游說，告訴街上的人們避難所發(fā)吃的和避暑的事。我們講給很多人聽，一些人感激，一些人氣惱，好多人漠不關心，也有幾個人表示熱心。我只管去聽別人說的話，在真正弄清什么含義之前，我的想法已經(jīng)發(fā)生了變化。

我相信美國夢。只要努力，充分發(fā)揮自己的潛能，你就會成功。但是當?shù)胤截溩右T你上鉤的時候，你又如何盡量克制十歲就開始有的可卡因癮呢?當你十三歲時被轟出家門，在由街頭妓院老板收留后，被強迫賣淫，你又如何對付?如果你出了車禍，住院一個月后，工作丟了，只留下一筆連保險公司都支付不了的賬單，那該怎么辦?這些只是我在市里一個小區(qū)做了三天的社區(qū)服務所聽到的幾件事。

我決定自愿參加這項活動，目的并不是要解決貧困問題。我想幫助幾個無家可歸的人，感覺自己很好心，甚至很正義，進而為自己在與貧困做斗爭時盡了力而感到滿足。我見到的那些男女老少使我改變了初衷，我再也不能熟視無睹，必須找辦法解決?？隙ㄓ行┖唵蔚霓k法是誰都沒有想到的，我不再考慮別的事情了，竭力尋找深藏在我內(nèi)心的解決辦法，結果一無所獲，連續(xù)工作、思考了三天，我也找不到解決我市貧困問題的答案。

問題依然存在著。在我回家的路上，每當無家可歸的人跟我要零錢的時候，我都會想到這個問題。它是我路過時，泡沫塑料杯中的錢幣叮叮當當?shù)捻懧暎凰巧斓轿颐媲捌砬蟮氖?；它是舉到我汽車窗外的厚紙板牌子。那我又能做什么呢?我既不能忘記，又不能忽視。我自己的選擇無非就是密切關注這個問題，只要一有機會，我們便不會放過。我知道自己還會到流動廚房去，因為如果希望根除貧困，就必須了解具體的情況。在解決這個大難題的斗爭中，總有一天我會得到啟示，有所發(fā)現(xiàn)。到那時，我還要堅持下去，生活中，絕沒有簡單的解決辦法。