本期點評名師
張超 男,河北省衡水市阜城縣第四中學高級英語教師、縣骨干教師、市優(yōu)秀英語教師,從事英語教育教學工作30 多年;多年來,在省級以上報刊發(fā)表文章數(shù)百篇,并有多篇文章獲獎;曾參與多本教輔資料的編寫工作;曾榮獲“中央教育科學研究所全國基礎(chǔ)教育科研先進個人”榮譽稱號;曾多次輔導多名學生在市、省和國家級英語競賽中獲獎。
Children?need to play and relax! Children want tohave good time①!
Every teacher wants their students to study hard at school. Every mother wantsher child to study hard at home, too. Mothers alwayssays②, “You need to study toget into a good senior school. And you need to study to get into a university. So now,you must study hard! ”
Look! Pleaselook us at③! We are busy reading. We are tired! Why? Why do westudy to get into a good senior school and university? In China, if you study at agood senior school and university, then you can have a good job. Probably you willwork harder so that you can have more and more money. But so what? We needhappy④, not money! We are just children! 河北省阜城縣第四中學萬彥紅
河北省阜城縣第四中學萬彥紅
優(yōu)點:
小作者多次使用感嘆句及設(shè)問表達真實情感,有利于吸引讀者的注意。
需要修改的地方:
①在have 后加a。have a good time 意為“玩得開心”。
②says 改為say。句子主語mothers 是復數(shù)形式,根據(jù)主謂一致原則,謂語動詞應(yīng)使say。
③look us at 改為look at us。短語look at 中,at 是介詞,不是副詞。
④happy 改為happiness。need 是及物動詞,其后需要接名詞作賓語。評分院
按照中考英語作文滿分20 分的標準,本文修改前可得18 分。