譯/郭碩

Being a teenager is difficult no matter what， and the coronavirus disease （COVID-19） is making it even harder. With school closures and cancelled events， many teens are missing out on1 some of the biggest moments of their young lives—as well as everyday moments like chatting with friends and participating in class.

For teenagers facing life changes due to the outbreak who are feeling anxious， isolated and disappointed， know this： you are not alone. We spoke with expert adolescent psychologist， best-selling author and monthly New York Times columnist Dr. Lisa Damour about what you can do to practice self-care and look after your mental health.

1. Recognize that your anxiety is completely normal

If school closures and alarming headlines are making you feel anxious， you are not the only one. In fact， thats how youre supposed to feel. “Psychologists have long recognized that anxiety is a normal and healthy function that alerts us to threats and helps us take measures to protect ourselves，” says Dr. Damour. “Your anxiety is going to help you make the decisions that you need to be making right now—not spending time with other people or in large groups， washing your hands and not touching your face.” Those feelings are helping to keep not only you safe， but others too. This is “also how we take care of members of our community. We think about the people around us， too.”

While anxiety around COVID-19 is completely understandable， make sure that you are using “reliable sources [such as the UNICEF2 and the World Health Organizations sites] to get information， or to check any information you might be getting through less reliable channels，” recommends Dr. Damour.

If you are worried that you are experiencing symptoms， it is important to speak to your parents about it. “Keep in mind that illness due to COVID-19 infection is generally mild， especially for children and young adults，” says Dr. Damour. Its also important to remember， that many of the symptoms of COVID-19 can be treated. She recommends letting your parents or a trusted adult know if youre not feeling well， or if youre feeling worried about the virus， so they can help.

And remember： “There are many effective things we can do to keep ourselves and others safe and to feel in better control of our circumstances： frequently wash our hands， dont touch our faces and engage in physical distancing.”

2. Create distractions

“What psychologists know is that when we are under chronically3 difficult conditions， its very helpful to divide the problem into two categories： things I can do something about， and then things I can do nothing about，” says Dr. Damour.

There is a lot that falls under that second category right now， and thats okay， but one thing that helps us to deal with that is creating distractions for ourselves. Dr. Damour suggests doing homework， watching a favourite movie or getting in bed with a novel as ways to seek relief and find balance in the day-to-day.

3. Find new ways to connect with your friends

If you want to spend time with friends while youre practicing physical distancing， social media is a great way to connect. “I would never underestimate the creativity of teenagers，” says Dr. Damour， “My hunch is that they will find ways to [connect] with one another online that are different from how theyve been doing it before.”

“[But] its not going to be a good idea to have unfettered4 access to screens and/or social media. Thats not healthy， thats not smart， it may amplify your anxiety，” says Dr. Damour， recommending you work out a screen-time schedule with your parents.

4. Focus on you

Have you been wanting to learn how to do something new， start a new book or spend time practicing a musical instrument？ Now is the time to do that. Focusing on yourself and finding ways to use your new-found time is a productive way to look after your mental health. “I have been making a list of all of the books I want to read and the things that Ive been meaning to do，” says Dr. Damour.

5. Feel your feelings

Missing out on events with friends， hobbies， or sports matches is incredibly disappointing. “These are large-scale losses. Theyre really upsetting and rightly so to teenagers，” says Dr. Damour. The best way to deal with this disappointment？ Let yourself feel it. “When it comes to having a painful feeling， the only way out is through. Go ahead and be sad， and if you can let yourself be sad， youll start to feel better faster.”

Processing your feelings looks different for everyone. “Some kids are going to make art， some kids are going to want to talk to their friends and use their shared sadness as a way to feel connected in a time when they cant be together in person， and some kids are going to want to find ways to get food to food banks5，” says Dr. Damour. Whats important is that you do what feels right to you.

6. Be kind to yourself and others

Some teens are facing bullying and abuse at school due to coronavirus. “Activating bystanders is the best way to address any kind of bullying，” says Dr. Damour. “Kids and teenagers who are targeted should not be expected to confront bullies; rather we should encourage them to turn to friends or adults for help and support.”

If you witness a friend being bullied， reach out to6 them and try to offer support. Doing nothing can leave the person feeling that everyone is against them or that nobody cares. Your words can make a difference.

And remember： now more than ever we need to be thoughtful about what we share or say that may hurt others.

青少年生活本就不易，新冠疫情來襲更是雪上加霜。由于學(xué)校停課、活動取消，很多青少年錯失了和朋友把臂言歡、在課堂踴躍發(fā)言等點(diǎn)滴日常，也錯過了他們青春歲月里一些最重要的時刻。

面對疫情給生活帶來的變化而感到焦慮、孤獨(dú)和失望的青少年們，請記住：你并不孤單。我們和青少年心理學(xué)專家、暢銷書作者、《紐約時報(bào)》每月發(fā)文一篇的專欄作家莉薩·達(dá)穆爾博士一起聊了聊青少年應(yīng)如何關(guān)愛自己以及維護(hù)自身的心理健康。

1.認(rèn)識到焦慮是完全正常的

如果因?yàn)閷W(xué)校停課和駭人的頭條而感到焦慮不安，那么有這種感受的不止你一個人。其實(shí)，正常的反應(yīng)就該如此?！靶睦韺W(xué)家早就發(fā)現(xiàn)，焦慮是一種正常、健康的機(jī)能，提醒我們注意威脅，幫助我們采取措施保護(hù)自己。”達(dá)穆爾博士說，“焦慮將會幫你做出當(dāng)下需要做的決定——不聚會、不扎堆、勤洗手、不摸臉。”這樣的情緒不僅有助于確保自身安全，也有助于確保他人安全。這“也是我們關(guān)愛社區(qū)成員的方式。我們也要為身邊的人著想”。

達(dá)穆爾博士建議，雖然對新冠肺炎的焦慮完全可以理解，但要確保自己是通過“可靠渠道（比如聯(lián)合國兒童基金會官網(wǎng)和世界衛(wèi)生組織官網(wǎng)）來獲取信息、查證來源不太可靠的消息”。

如果擔(dān)心自己有癥狀，務(wù)必告知父母。達(dá)穆爾博士說：“要記住，由新冠病毒感染所致的疾病通常屬于輕癥，特別是對兒童和年輕人來說?！边€有一點(diǎn)很重要，就是要記住，新冠肺炎的很多癥狀都是可以醫(yī)治的。她建議，如果感到身體不適，或者擔(dān)心自己被感染，務(wù)必告訴父母或你信任的其他大人，以便獲得幫助。

不要忘了：“我們能做很多實(shí)實(shí)在在的事來保護(hù)自身和他人的安全，增強(qiáng)我們對當(dāng)前處境的掌控感，比如勤洗手、不摸臉、保持人身距離。”

2.轉(zhuǎn)移注意力

“心理學(xué)家知道，在面臨長期的困難處境時，把問題分成兩類會很有幫助：能改變的事和不能改變的事。”達(dá)穆爾博士如是說。

當(dāng)前發(fā)生的很多事都屬于第二類，這沒什么大不了，不過有個方法能幫我們應(yīng)對這種情況——轉(zhuǎn)移注意力。達(dá)穆爾博士建議，在日常生活中，可以通過寫作業(yè)、看喜歡的電影或者在床上讀小說等方式來讓自己得到放松、找到平衡。

3.找到和朋友交流的新方法

假如在保持人身距離期間想要和朋友共度時光，社交媒體是不錯的選擇?！拔覐膩聿粫凸狼嗌倌甑膭?chuàng)造力?！边_(dá)穆爾博士說，“直覺告訴我，他們會找到一些不同以往的網(wǎng)絡(luò)溝通方式?！?/p>

“（但是）無限制地盯著屏幕和/或使用社交媒體并不可取。這種做法無益健康，不是明智之舉，還可能加深你的焦慮。”達(dá)穆爾博士建議青少年和家長一起商定一個屏幕使用時間表。

4.專注于自己

你是不是一直想學(xué)點(diǎn)兒新東西、讀本新書或花時間練習(xí)樂器？現(xiàn)在機(jī)會來了。專注于自己，想辦法利用這些多出來的時間，這是呵護(hù)心理健康的有效途徑。達(dá)穆爾博士說：“我一直都把所有自己想讀的書和打算做的事列在清單上?！?/p>

5.不回避情緒

無緣朋友聚會、中斷業(yè)余愛好、錯過體育比賽都是非常令人掃興的。達(dá)穆爾博士說：“這些損失是大范圍的，確實(shí)會讓青少年感到失落，這也是正常的?！笔鑼?dǎo)這種失望情緒的最好辦法是什么？那就是讓自己感受它。“經(jīng)歷痛苦情緒時，擺脫的唯一辦法就是宣泄情緒。順其自然，想傷心就傷心，如果能讓自己傷心，那會更快恢復(fù)?！?/p>

每個人處理情緒的方式不同。達(dá)穆爾博士說：“有的孩子會進(jìn)行藝術(shù)創(chuàng)作;有的孩子會想找朋友說說話，在不能面對面相聚的時候通過互訴苦衷來感受與他人的聯(lián)系;也有的孩子希望能想辦法給食物賑濟(jì)處捐些食物?！敝匾氖亲瞿阌X得該做的事。

6.善待自己和他人

一些青少年因?yàn)樾鹿谝咔槎馐苄@欺凌?！肮膭优杂^者出手相助是應(yīng)對各種欺凌的最好辦法?！边_(dá)穆爾博士說，“不該要求受到欺凌的兒童和青少年與欺凌者硬碰硬，而要鼓勵他們向朋友或大人尋求幫助和支持?！?/p>

如果遇到朋友被欺凌，要伸出援手提供幫助。毫不作為會讓被欺凌者覺得所有人都在跟他們作對或者沒有人在乎。說幾句支持的話會產(chǎn)生很大的作用。

還要記得：當(dāng)前我們比以往任何時候都要注意自己分享的事和說的話，避免可能傷害到別人。

（譯者單位：天津鐵道職業(yè)技術(shù)學(xué)院）