文/James Michael Estes 譯/張佳藝

“己所不欲，勿施于人”，本著公平之心，每年我都這樣對待我的學(xué)生。這也是在應(yīng)對他們大肆抱怨任務(wù)、作業(yè)或工作量之前，我所采取的先發(fā)制人的戰(zhàn)術(shù)。期末考試時，我?guī)У钠渲腥齻€班級也將按要求寫作、演講，至少在前半生中，我一直這樣要求他們是公平合理的。

沉醉中國文化親自尋根中國

我在美國度過了我教學(xué)生涯的前八年，當時我任教于舊金山的一所距唐人街最近的中學(xué)。我的學(xué)生中，85%都是中國人，其他一些是第三、四代美國人，也有一些學(xué)生初到美國。后來我被大多數(shù)人所擁有的中國文化深深吸引并沉醉其中，于是我決定親自去尋根。2013年12月，我?guī)е恢回?、四個行李箱和一把吉他來到北京，打算趁著年輕，尚可以在踏上下一場冒險之旅之前，在中國待上一年。我找到了我的另一半，我們還養(yǎng)了兩只狗，擁有了一輛裝載雜物的搬家卡車。我的中國之旅與我起初的預(yù)想偏差甚遠，但世事大多如此。

我的中國經(jīng)歷發(fā)生在兩座城市：在北京，我曾在中關(guān)村外國語學(xué)校的一個國際項目中任教。我和這群高中生共度了兩年時光。畢業(yè)后，他們?nèi)ッ绹M行深造。后來我和我的妻子從北京搬到了青島，我便開始在培訓(xùn)中心教托福、雅思和AP課程。在那里，我依然教一些即將赴美國、英國、加拿大、澳大利亞、新西蘭留學(xué)的學(xué)生。自學(xué)期伊始，我一直在青島韓國國際學(xué)校教英語和歷史。我的學(xué)生幾乎都是韓國人，他們在韓國出生、長大，后來隨家人移民到中國，很多人已經(jīng)在中國生活多年，其中一些人在中國生活的時間甚至比在他們的祖國還要久。他們幾乎都將離開陪伴自己長大的社區(qū)、朋友，甚至是家人，而后回到韓國上大學(xué)?？梢哉f，我過去四年的工作是在不同城市與來自不同背景的學(xué)生一同度過的。他們之間有一個共性：我們相處一段時間后，他們便登上飛機，跨越大洋，在一片新土地上獨自開始新的生活。

In the spirit of fairness I tell my students each year (preemptively,before any complaints about tasks or assignments or workloads even have a chance to fester) that I will never ask them to do something I wouldn’t also do myself. My kids will have final exams, and three of my classes will write and deliver a speech on demand; it’s only equitable that I do at least the first half as well.

Being immersed in Chinese culture made me come to the source

I spent the first eight years of my career teaching in the US,where my school in San Francisco was the closest middle school to Chinatown. 85% of my students were Chinese. Some of them were third and fourth generation Americans; some of them had just arrived. Eventually I became so fascinated by and immersed in the culture that I decided to come to the source and see it for myself. I arrived in Beijing in December 2013, with a cat, four suitcases, a guitar, and the intention of spending perhaps a year in China before leap frogging off to the next adventure while I was still (semi)young. Over the course of my time here I’ve somehow managed to pick up a wife, two dogs, and a moving truck worth of clutter in our happy home. My Chinese adventure hasn’t at all been what I expected but that’s the way things go.

My time in China has been spent in two cities: in Beijing I taught in the international program at Zhongguancun Foreign Language School. I kept the same group of high school students for two years, and after graduating, they headed to the US for college. When my wife and I relocated from Beijing to Qingdao, I began teaching at a training center teaching TOEFL, IELTS, and AP classes - again working with Chinese students who were in their last semesters at home before going abroad to universities in the US, England, Canada, Australia, and New Zealand. Since the beginning of this semester, I’ve been teaching English and History at the Korean International School in Qingdao. Almost all of my students are Korean, having been born and raised in Korea before immigrating with their families to China. Many of them have been here for years, with some of them having spent more of their lives in China than in their homeland. Almost all of them however will return to Korea for college, leaving behind their adopted communities, their friends, and in most cases, their families here in China. To put it differently, I have spent the past four years of my life working with students in different cities and from different backgrounds but with one commonality that binds them all together: after their time with me is finished, they’ll get on a plane, cross a sea, and begin a new life in a new land. Alone.

作者（右二）和泰安學(xué)生一起爬泰山

教學(xué)中，我強調(diào)角色代入、深入分析。歷史課上，我讓他們用批判的歷史思維去理解過去的人物和思想。我們會采取人物扮演、蘇格拉底研討會等任何能提供不同視角的形式；文學(xué)課上，也是如此。我希望孩子們能在詩歌或小說中找到與自己有共通之處的角色，把自己代入故事中，激勵自己深入挖掘分析。

借歌教詩探索生命與世界

我還在舊金山生活、教書時，我的一位朋友就已經(jīng)名聲“小”噪了。Ben Cooper和我在佛羅里達州杰克遜維爾的某條街上一起長大，他一直有志成為自給自足的音樂家兼作曲家。他把他一首剛問世便引起軒然大波的歌賣給了尼康，這首熱門歌曲被全世界的電視廣告選用播出。到了2011年，他已經(jīng)能夠資助、創(chuàng)作、錄制、發(fā)行三部曲專輯中的第一張。作為一名英語語言文學(xué)老師，我覺得將Ben的歌詞運用到課堂詩歌教學(xué)中會很酷。我把他的一些作品介紹給我的美國學(xué)生，他們很喜歡。但當我把他的歌帶來中國，和中國學(xué)生們一起欣賞時，我開始感受到歌曲的全新內(nèi)涵。

Ben的其中一首歌在我的中國學(xué)生中引起了強烈的共鳴，我將在后文附上完整版歌詞。究其本質(zhì)，這是敘述者作為同胞對探索生命與世界的遠觀與記錄。我們無從猜測文中的角色是男是女，也不知道他們彼此之間的關(guān)聯(lián)是怎樣的，可能是伴侶、家人、朋友、知己等。歌詞中避免過多出現(xiàn)主角，而是由讀者根據(jù)自身對故事與人物的理解去自塑形象。在我的課堂上，我激勵學(xué)生自主思考其中意義，只要不違背文本即可。給青少年以闡釋的自由會得到很多帶有浪漫色彩的回應(yīng)：這是一首講述男孩得不到女孩的詩，這是一首破碎的戀人間不再聯(lián)系的故事……諸如此類。這些情節(jié)可能是真的，有些是很普遍存在的。憑經(jīng)驗而談，17歲的孩子腦中常常充滿愛，這一點無論在中國還是美國并沒有什么不同。課程臨結(jié)束時，在我組織學(xué)生們互相表達觀點后，我開始分享自己對這首詩的理解，也可以說是我來中國教學(xué)以后的新感悟。

When teaching, I emphasize to students that they need to be actively finding ways to connect with a text. If it’s a history class I want them to use critical historical thinking to empathize with figures and ideas of the past. We use role playing, Socratic Seminar; anything that helps them examine things from varying perspectives. In a literature class I like to do the same. My hope is that kids can find a character in a poem or a novel that they connect with; someone that draws them into the story and encourages them to dig a little deeper in their analysis.

Using songs to teach poetry, explore the wonders of life and world

Back while I was still living and teaching in San Francisco, a friend of mine became moderately famous. Ben Cooper grew up down the street from me in Jacksonville, Florida, and had determined to become a self-suf ficient musician and songwriter.He had an unexpected hit song that was sold to Nikon and ran on TV commercials all over the world, and by 2011 he had been able to fund, write, record, and release the first of a trilogy of albums.Being an English language and literature teacher, I thought it’d be cool to sneak some of my friend’s songs into my classes by using Ben’s lyrics to teach poetry. I introduced some of his work to my students in America and they enjoyed it, but it took me coming to China and working with students here to appreciate an entirely new meaning to one song in particular.

So there’s one of Ben’s songs that has resonated incredibly powerfully with my students in China. I’ll attach the full lyrics below, but essentially it’s the story of a narrator who watches from a distance as a compatriot dashes off and explores the wonders of life and world. We don’t know if the characters are male or female. We don’t know what their relationships to one another are, be it romantic, familial, friendship, mentor, etc. The lyrics avoid revealing too much about the principal characters so that it’s up to the reader to appropriate the story and personalize it with his or her own meaning. In my classes, I push students to find their own meaning, so long as it can’t be directly contradicted by the text. Now, you know, giving teenagers this kind of latitude for interpretation gets a lot of reactions in the romance vein; it’s a poem about a boy who can’t get a girl…it’s the story of broken lovers who can’t seem to connect, blah blah blah.Which might be true. Some things are universal, and 17 year-olds with love on the brain is, in my experience, no different in China than it is in America. But at the end of the lesson, after I’ve allowed students to share their own ideas with one another, I’ve begun sharing my own interpretation of this poem, newfound since I began my teaching in China.

我認為兩個角色之間的關(guān)系并不重要，至少對我來說無關(guān)緊要。重要的是，一個人“退”可賦閑在家，“進”可走出舒適區(qū)，到外面的世界為了自己的追求不遺余力，而且從來都深深銘記自己從何而來，以及“根”在何處。直到開始在這里工作，我才明白這一點。在我看來，這是一首關(guān)于我的學(xué)生的詩。他們承受著這種沖突和孤獨，但卻以旁人無法企及的姿態(tài)，無懼無畏地直面這個陌生的新世界。我告訴他們，我眼中的他們伴著音樂翩翩起舞，然而并不是每個人都愿意或者都能夠感受到旋律的。聽后，他們的反應(yīng)錯綜復(fù)雜，但卻強而有力。有些學(xué)生甚至感受到了因詩歌賦予人自由而帶來的“頓悟時刻”，從而意識到文學(xué)并沒有那么糟糕；有些人為自己一直以來所擁有卻不曾承認過的力量而倍感自豪；很多人在意識到生活即將經(jīng)受一場難以形容的劇烈變化時而潸然淚下。雖然反應(yīng)各異，但所有學(xué)生都很感激我們花了整堂課的時間來討論這首歌。我的教學(xué)生涯已經(jīng)進入第13個年頭了，可直至我來到中國與無數(shù)優(yōu)秀面孔共事的這四年，我的所感所知才真正透徹。

他們絕不僅僅是學(xué)生

另外值得一提的是，絕大多數(shù)在中國生活、工作的外籍教師都對學(xué)生虧欠一份感激之情。我確信學(xué)生們并沒有意識到這一點，但于我們而言，他們絕不僅僅是學(xué)生。現(xiàn)在，我是在代表每一位我在中國遇到的外籍教師發(fā)聲，包括我自己。每天我們走在異國他鄉(xiāng)，長著異國面孔，帶著異國文化，說著異國語言。當然，這是我們自己的選擇，我們對此很享受。體驗與眾不同的新鮮事物是我們來到這里的初衷之一。我們在中國的生活很大程度上與過去脫節(jié)：地點，人民，文化，以及我們從小便接觸的語言——英語。很多情況下，學(xué)生和同事都是我們的“橋梁”。我不會每天都和母親聊天，下班回家后我也不能跟在世界另一端休息的好友通話，我無法與我在平素生活中與之交往的大多數(shù)人進行真正深入的溝通。我想，對大多數(shù)外籍教師來說都是如此。不知不覺間，我們的學(xué)生卻每天都給我們創(chuàng)造出了聯(lián)絡(luò)生活、文化和語言的機會。我不能和朋友通話，但我可以向?qū)W生們展示我和Ben一起創(chuàng)作的歌；我不能常和母親聊天，但我可以給學(xué)生講講她的故事。所有的這些被帶入課堂后，我的學(xué)生便不僅僅是我的學(xué)生了，他們成了讓我在背井離鄉(xiāng)時卻依然感到賓至如歸的人。時不時地，我也會回饋善意。今年四月清明節(jié)期間，我從前的三位泰安學(xué)生在他們的家鄉(xiāng)接待了我。他們邀我四處參觀，帶我去吃他們最喜歡的餐館，還和我一起徒步登上泰山峰頂（實際登頂遠比在山腳下想象得要累，但絕對不虛此行）。其中一位是Annie Fang，她剛在我16年前上大學(xué)的城市西雅圖完成第一學(xué)期的課程。現(xiàn)在，我反過來成為那個給出建議的人，告訴他們要去哪些漢堡店，或是去哪些音樂場所看演出。

See, I don’t think it matters what the relationship is between the two characters whatsoever; to me that’s irrelevant. What’s of signi ficance is the dichotomy between one person who stays comfortably at home, and another who wanders out into the world, far from their comfort zone, striving for something but never losing sight of where they come from and where their roots remain. I didn’t understand that until I began my work here. In my mind, this is a poem about my students; the ones who undertake such strife and solitude but who endeavor to brave the strange new world that others cannot. I tell them that in my mind, they’re the ones dancing to music that not everyone is willing or able to hear. Their reactions are mixed but always powerful. Some have an AHA! Moment about the freedom poetry provides and realizes literature isn’t so bad. Some bask in pride in the strength they’ve always had but never bothered to acknowledge. More than a few shed tears at the realization that their life is about to undergo an indescribably drastic change.But all are appreciative that we spent the class period discussing the song. I’m in the midst of my 13th year teaching, but there are lessons I could never have fully learned until coming to China and working with the myriad wonderful faces I’ve found here over the past four years.

They are something more than just students to us

The other thing worth mentioning and I assume this is true for the vast majority of foreign teachers living and working in China,is that we actually owe a great debt of gratitude to our students.I’m quite sure they’re not aware of this, but they are something a little bit more than just students to us. I’m speaking on behalf now of every foreign teacher I’ve met during my time in China,and for myself. Every day we walk around in foreign cities, with foreign faces, a foreign culture, and a foreign language. This was our own choice of course, and we enjoy it. Experiencing something new and different is part of why we came. But we spend our lives here in China largely disconnected from the lives of our pasts; the places, the people, the cultures, and the language - English - that we’ve known from our earliest days of childhood. In many cases,our students and our colleagues are our bridges. I don’t get to talk to my mother every day. I can’t call my best friend when I get home from work because he’s asleep halfway around the world. I really can’t communicate - truly, deeply communicate - with most people I interact with in my daily life here. I think this is true for most foreign teachers. But every day - without even knowing it- our students give us the chance to stay in touch with our lives,our cultures, and our language. I can’t call my friend, but I can show my students a song that Ben and I worked on together.I can’t talk to my mother, but I can tell them a story about my mom. Bringing all of this into the classroom turns my students into more than just my students; they also become the people who have made me feel so at home in such a faraway place. And once in a while, I get to return the favor. Three of my old students from Tai’an hosted me in their hometown during the Qing Ming Festival this past April. They showed me around, took me to their favorite restaurants, and hiked with me to the top of Taishan(more grueling than it looks from the bottom but totally worth it).One of them was Annie Fang, who, poetically, just finished her first semester in the same city I chose for college sixteen years ago- Seattle. Now I’m the one who gets to give advice about which burger places to hit or what music venues to see a show at.

我的母親是一名工程師，但卻為了生兒育女而離開了她的職業(yè)生涯。我和我的兄弟們長大后，她又回去工作了，但這次她選擇做一名教師。每當人們問起她為什么放棄收入可觀且受人愛戴的工作而選擇成為一名教育工作者時，她總是回答：“因為工作中能和孩子們一起，要比和成年人一起有趣得多。”我完全同意母親的話。我不知道自己還會在中國待多久，在中國生活的時光教給我，盡管提前規(guī)劃很有意義，但總有些事情任你如何努力也無法準備得盡善盡美。

中國之行如優(yōu)美的旋律，我欣賞其中的每行每句。

My mother was an engineer who left her career to have children.When my brothers and I were older, she went back to work - but this time as a teacher. Whenever people asked her why she left such a lucrative and respected profession to become an educator,she would always answer, “because working with kids is WAY more fun than working with adults.” I completely agree. I don’t know how long I’ll remain in China, and my time here has taught me that while there’s value in planning ahead, there are some things you just can’t prepare for no matter how hard you try.

My time here has been a beautiful melody though, and I’ve appreciated every line of the song.