一沁供稿

運(yùn)動(dòng)場(chǎng)上樂翻天

Laughter Around the Playing Field

一沁供稿

1.

Two baseball pitchers[投手]promised each other. If one of them died first, he would come back as a ghost to tell the other if there was baseball in heaven. Then one of them died and came back as a ghost and said, “I have some good news and some bad news.” The other person said, “Tell me.”

So the ghost said, “The good news is that there is baseball in heaven, but the bad news is that you are pitching tomorrow.”

2.

A guy took his girlfriend to her first football game. Afterward[過后], he asked her how she liked the game.

“I liked it, but I couldn’t understand why they were killing each other for 25 cents[分幣],”she said.

“What do you mean?” he asked.

“Well, everyone kept yelling[叫喊], ‘Get the quarterback注!’” she answered.

注：quarter有25分硬幣的意思；而quarterback在橄欖球比賽中是指四分衛(wèi)，是進(jìn)攻組的一員。

3.

Michael Johnson, the Olympic gold medal runner, was on his way to a club with some friends. At the door, the bouncer[保安]turned to him and said, “Sorry, man. You can’t come in here—no denim[牛仔布].” Michael was quite annoyed at this and retorted[反駁], “Don’t you know who I am? I’m Michael Johnson.”

“Then it won’t take you long to run home and change, will it?” replied the bouncer.

4.

—What did one tennis ball say to the other tennis ball?

—“See you round注…”

注：網(wǎng)球是圓的（round）；see you round=see you around=see you later。

5.

Funny Swimming Pool Sign:

“Welcome to our _OOL. Notice there is no “P” in it? We’d like you to keep it that way.” (The pronunciation of “P”is the same as “pee[小便].”)