林巍
【原文】
“哭哭啼啼沒出息”
[1]李敖喜歡海明威。海明威說過,人可以被打敗,但卻不可以被打垮。這一點,李敖做到了。[2]他曾經(jīng)嘲笑過大陸的“傷痕文學”是“哭哭啼啼沒出息”。[3]他曾入獄受了10年折磨,但出來后春風不改,笑容依舊。[4]稍事片刻的休整,他又拍馬挺槍,再次上陣搏殺了,而且越戰(zhàn)越勇。所以,他是有權嘲笑的。
【點評】
李敖原是大陸人,后隨著那場歷史性的變故到了臺灣,成為兩岸知名的、頗具特色的學者和作家。許多參賽者在翻譯的同時對相關的背景做了功課,有的還寫了注釋,這是非??扇〉?翻譯中其實少不了學術成分。
對于題目,有的參賽者漏掉沒有翻譯,這是不應該的,因題目是文章的有機甚至是重要的組成部分,關系到下面內容。對此,一般譯成Weeping and Wailing Produces Nothing、Useless Tears、Unpromising Weeps等,有的作了引申的意譯,如Like a Sniveling Victim Without Bright Prospect、Pathetic Losers等,應當說,除了其中的一些語法、詞語表述等問題外,不啻為有益嘗試。在形式上,題目應為黑體(bold),而英文單詞的第一個字母要大寫。對此,為簡潔醒目,不妨譯為:Li Ao: Mere Weeping is Good for Nothing。
[1]中,“李敖喜歡海明威。海明威說過……”,許多人跟隨原文,譯成“Li Ao loves Hemingway. Hemingway said that…”,然而依據(jù)中文“意合”、英文“形合”的特點,第二個Hemingway可用代詞who或whose (saying) 等,以避免重復。順便說,有參賽者將“海明威”拼寫成Hai Mingwei,可見其不知美國此著名作家。
對于“人可以被打敗,但卻不可以被打垮”,許多人譯成“people can be defeated, but can not be beaten down”“human beings could be defeated, but they couldn’t be knocked down”“one can be beaten but never be broken”等,顯然沒有核對原文。該名句出自海明威的名著《老人與?!罚═he Old Man and the Sea):But man is not made for defeat. A man can be destroyed but not defeated. 直譯為:但人不是為失敗而生的。一個人可以被消滅,但不能被打敗。原文在引用時作了些變通,即說成“打敗”,主要是將destroy淡化了,而此處指的是人生中有數(shù)的失敗,如:There are men who simply don’t like being beaten by a woman.(有些男人就是不想被女人打敗。)故此處若用beat也可以接受。“打垮”,則可用defeat,該詞固然有物質方面的,如:Our soldiers inflicted a severe defeat upon the enemy troops.(我軍使敵軍遭到慘敗。)同時,更有精神方面的,如the feeling that accompanies an experience of being thwarted in attaining your goals,即有理想破滅之意,如:After the pain of defeat passes, England have some thinking to do.(失敗的痛苦過去以后,英國人應該認真反思一下。)beat和defeat可結合使用,如:We can be beaten thousands of times but never be defeated.(我們可以被千百次地打倒,但我們不能接受失敗。)
“這一點,李敖做到了。”參賽者一般譯成“Li Ao did/made it.”“This is what exactly Li Ao did.”“Li Ao lived up to this sentence.”其實“He was the man.”是有特指的,如:I always knew that he was the man for me.(對我來說,他就是世上無可取代的那個人。)應當說,有的譯文相當不錯,如:As an admirer of Hemingway, Li Ao lived up to what his idol said of a man who “can be destroyed but not defeated”.
故此,該句不妨譯為:Li Ao liked Hemingway, who said that man can be destroyed but not defeated. Li Ao was surely the man in this regard.
[2]中的“嘲笑”,參賽譯文用了ridicule、scorn、mock、deride、make fun of、jeer at等,若前后搭配恰當,似都可接受。
所謂“傷痕文學”是上世紀70年代末到80年代初在中國文壇出現(xiàn)的一種特有的文學現(xiàn)象,因短篇小說《傷痕》而得名,揭示了“文革”對人們心靈的沉痛傷害,有其特殊的歷史價值,李敖的觀點未必中肯,此處不加評說。單就翻譯而言,有譯為trauma literature、bruise literature等,但更確切的應為 “Scar Literature”(即所謂的,應加引號)。
故該句不妨譯為:He once ridiculed the “Scar Literature” on Chinese mainland as merely weeping and wailing that are good for nothing.
[3]中,“他曾入獄受了10年折磨”,參賽者作了多方嘗試,如He was tormented for ten years in prison、He had been in jail for a torturous ten years等,似都可接受,但了解背景的,還應作點兒“增譯”,如Having been put in jail in Taiwan where he suffered for ten years。
“春風不改,笑容依舊”是一種文學語言,形容他意志并未頹喪。有的譯得比較實,如his smile still bloomed after liberation;有的稍放開一些,如he remained smiling and active after releasing from prison;還有的更偏意譯,如he didn’t change after he was released from prison。其實,若指其精神狀態(tài)并未change,則不妨用intact,其義為not harmed or damaged as a result of something that has happened,類似的,如:His reputation survived intact.(他的名聲絲毫未受影響。)同時,可結合smiling和confident。
故整句不妨譯為:Having been put in jail in Taiwan where he suffered for ten years, he came out intact, as he was still smiling and confident.令人欣喜的是,亦有參賽譯文非常出彩,如:He was justified in doing so as he had endured a decade of suffering behind bars, but he emerged with his spirit unbroken and his smile undimmed.
[4]中,“稍事片刻的休整”是一種夸張,似不必實譯成took a momen-tary rest等。
“他又拍馬挺槍……而且越戰(zhàn)越勇”則可實可虛,前者如“he became a warrior again who, holding a spear on horseback, charged back into battle, his courage mounting as he fought on”“he grabbed his spear and mounted the horse to fight again and even more bravely like a knight in the literary battlefield”等,而后者不宜太略,如“he was setting out again, and getting better and better”“allowed him for another round of fight”等。總之,應有“重整旗鼓”之意,如用rallied his forces或pulled himself together。
對于“有權嘲笑”中的“權”,大都譯成right、power,須知,此二詞都是法律概念,而此處更多體現(xiàn)的是一種社會價值中的“資格”(配不配),故可用be entitled to或in a position to,如:①He was entitled to have a state funeral.(他有權享受國葬待遇。)②He is in a position to comment on this matter.(他最有權評論此事。)
此句不妨譯為:Taking a break, he rallied his forces and started afresh, fighting even more courageously. He was thus entitled to make fun of what he had said.
盡管李敖是個爭議性人物,但他那種不服輸?shù)木?、屢敗屢?zhàn)的斗志,即使對于不斷面對挑戰(zhàn)的譯者,也多少不乏正能量。? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?□
【優(yōu)勝者】
李美尼(海南)? ?郝福合(北京)? ?寶靜雅(內蒙古)