本文的作者是早年在中國大陸從事英語教學(xué),后移居加拿大,繼續(xù)從英語教學(xué)工作的一位經(jīng)驗(yàn)豐富的英文教學(xué)專家。她通過實(shí)踐總結(jié)出了一套極為有效的英文寫作學(xué)習(xí)方法和技巧。相信一定能夠給有志向?qū)W好英語并想出國深造的同學(xué)帶來極大的幫助。
一、怎樣寫出地道的英文句子
做為一名英文教師,我有著20多年的英文教學(xué)經(jīng)驗(yàn),尤其是在海外多年的教學(xué),讓我對(duì)英語學(xué)習(xí)有了更深的體會(huì)。在這里,我想就英文寫作中普遍存在的一些問題與大家共同探討分享感悟。
首先,我想通過一些實(shí)例對(duì)英文寫作中普遍存在的問題做些具體分析。對(duì)中國人來講,英文寫作要應(yīng)付兩種考試:一種是ESL的各類英文考試:中國的高考、四級(jí)、六級(jí)、考研及全球認(rèn)可的托福、雅思等等;另外一種是進(jìn)入美國、加拿大一些大學(xué)的寫作考試,例如SAT(Scholaslic Assessment Test)及LPI(Language Proficiency Index)。這是兩種程度完全不同的考試。簡單說,ESL寫作只要句子對(duì),有基本寫作格式和一定的論據(jù),考試過關(guān)就沒問題。而SAT及LPI這類考試是一種相當(dāng)于中國高考語文作文的寫作考試,英語為母語的人都很難過關(guān),更不用說母語不是英語的人了。這類寫作我會(huì)放在最后講。我先講的是ESL和SAT及LPI兩種不同程度的寫作考試的共性,也是寫作中最基本、最重要部分。
英文寫作是由兩方面的技能組成;一是Techinal部分,包括文章的格式(format)、語法(grammar)、句子結(jié)構(gòu)(sentence structure);二是表達(dá)部分,包括詞的用法(word usage)、句子組合(sentence combination)、文體一致(style agreement)。對(duì)一個(gè)ESL學(xué)生來講,寫作的第一步是能把句子寫對(duì)。什么是對(duì)的句子?這是問題的關(guān)鍵。
正確的句子絕不是簡單的中文翻譯,更不是語法的簡單排列。正確的句子就是以英語為母語的人能讀懂你在寫什么為標(biāo)準(zhǔn)。秘訣就是簡單準(zhǔn)確(Simple but correct)。如果只是簡單地把中文按字面意思翻成英文肯定會(huì)出錯(cuò)。例如:“文學(xué)來源于生活,高于生活”。很多中國學(xué)生是這樣表述的:Literature comes from life but beyond life.加拿大老師無論怎樣都讀不懂。他們會(huì)這樣寫:Literature dramatizes life.
再比如,“要想提高英文得多同加拿大人接觸”。中國學(xué)生基本會(huì)直接翻譯過來:To improve Enslish, we should keep contact with Canadian people more often.這是一個(gè)很令加拿大人費(fèi)解的句子keep contact with的意思是與人保持聯(lián)系,一般指熟人,用在這里不妥,沒有表答出寫作者的真正意思,因?yàn)橐杂⒄Z為本族語的人讀不懂,你的同學(xué)甚至你的中國老師讀懂沒用,因?yàn)樗麄兺阋粯右彩怯弥凶g英的方法。加拿大人會(huì)這樣寫:To improve EnSlish,we should expose ourselves more often to Canadian people.怎樣避免這樣的問題并不需要來加拿大留學(xué),在中國學(xué)英文照樣能學(xué)得地道。關(guān)鍵是怎么學(xué)?從哪里下手?我在后面會(huì)具體講。
在寫作時(shí),切記不要寫太深?yuàn)W、難翻的句子,盡可能直截了當(dāng)?shù)乇硎?。例如:“蘋果有營養(yǎng)?!比绻悴恢馈皀utricious”這個(gè)詞怎么辦?那就簡單意譯:Apples are good for health.千萬不要以為寫得簡單拿不到高分,可是寫一個(gè)錯(cuò)句根本拿不到分。簡單句容易寫對(duì)。但是大多數(shù)中國學(xué)生就是陷在這個(gè)誤區(qū)出不來。這也難免,中國學(xué)生特別是具備高等學(xué)歷以上的成年學(xué)生這個(gè)問題最突出。這些人的中文水平和邏輯思維能力都已相當(dāng)成熟,而英文的語言表達(dá)能力跟不上,又不肯“低就”寫簡單、準(zhǔn)確的句子。簡單準(zhǔn)確是所有語言寫作的基礎(chǔ)。中文也是如此,我們剛開始上小學(xué)時(shí)寫作是從組詞造句開始,并且句子很簡單?!八哪樇t得像蘋果。”一個(gè)一年級(jí)的小學(xué)生寫這樣的句子應(yīng)該很正常,老師不會(huì)期盼這么小的孩子寫出“她的臉嫣紅”這樣的句子。因此,寫作是由簡單準(zhǔn)確開始,然后逐步過渡到優(yōu)秀,也就是與你的思維能力基本同步。
我接觸過許多來自大陸的學(xué)生,他們大多是在國內(nèi)接受過考前強(qiáng)化培訓(xùn),甚至有為數(shù)不少的人還曾花幾十萬元在國內(nèi)上過所謂的預(yù)科學(xué)校,有的托福成績非常高。,然而,就是這樣的學(xué)生寫出的作文竟也有許多讓人摸不著頭腦的地方。他們一個(gè)共同的特點(diǎn)就是特別喜歡寫長句,寫從句。例如:The barrier which is formidable is language.這是中國學(xué)生寫的十分典型的錯(cuò)句。有很多學(xué)生不服氣,認(rèn)為自己寫的句子有主語,有動(dòng)詞,還有定語從句呢,多有水平。問題就出在這兒,真正的英文寫作一定要避免重復(fù),每個(gè)詞都要有用。上面的句子用一個(gè)簡單句就可以表達(dá)清楚:The language barrier is formidable.
使用過多從句不但使讀者困惑,最主要是容易出錯(cuò)。例如:Before going to the grocery,you should make a list if you make ahabit of planning first,you will not buy unneeded items.這個(gè)句子看上去挺長、挺有水平的,但是個(gè)錯(cuò)句。請(qǐng)讀者認(rèn)真讀一下這個(gè)句子,用已學(xué) 的英文知識(shí)改正這個(gè)錯(cuò)句。接下來就開始進(jìn)入主題。先談?wù)勚袊鴮W(xué)生也是ESL學(xué)生甚至包括本族學(xué)生也存在的問題,四大類型的句子錯(cuò)誤。很多知識(shí)點(diǎn)是當(dāng)?shù)刂袑W(xué)生的英文寫作內(nèi)容,是寫作基礎(chǔ)的基礎(chǔ)。上面句子的正確答案是接下來要主講的內(nèi)容之一,請(qǐng)大家繼續(xù)關(guān)注。
二、英文寫作中常見的錯(cuò)句
(一)粘連句
在這一部分,我談?wù)剣袑W(xué)生最常犯但又幾乎意識(shí)不到的四種句子錯(cuò)誤。因?yàn)椋瑢?duì)這幾種錯(cuò)誤,很多中國學(xué)生出國前根本沒把這些當(dāng)成什么錯(cuò)兒,但是,出來后卻發(fā)現(xiàn),在國外的英文寫作中這些錯(cuò)是非常嚴(yán)重的錯(cuò)誤,很多學(xué)生6分的作文只能拿到2到3分,挫折感很大。這也許是國內(nèi)外英文教學(xué)的側(cè)重點(diǎn)不同造成的吧?;谶@些同學(xué)的經(jīng)歷,作為一名英文教師,我深感有必要把國外的英文教學(xué)介紹給中國的讀者,在未來的英文學(xué)習(xí)尤其是有一天來到國外學(xué)習(xí)深造時(shí)少走彎路。
我們都知道,寫作的基礎(chǔ)是句子。什么是句子?大部分人會(huì)想到主謂賓的結(jié)構(gòu),但這個(gè)概念并非十分嚴(yán)密。例如:Because l have a baby.盡管包含了主謂賓成分,但不是句子,至少不是一個(gè)完整的句子。Money talks.沒有賓語仍然是句子。簡單講,一個(gè)完整句子=subject+verb+complete idea.(主語+動(dòng)詞+完整意思+句號(hào))。句子的概念是看似簡單但卻是英文閱讀及寫作的靈魂。托??荚囍姓Z法部分很大程度上都是在考這個(gè)最基本的句子概念:基于這個(gè)概念我們來看第一類常見錯(cuò)誤:粘連句(run-on sentence)。
在寫作時(shí),一個(gè)句子寫它后最常用的標(biāo)點(diǎn)是句號(hào),以告訴讀者,意思到此結(jié)束。如果在兩個(gè)完整句之間點(diǎn)逗號(hào)( ,),就使前后兩句變成了粘連句。這種錯(cuò)誤叫逗號(hào)粘連(comma slice),因?yàn)槎禾?hào)只是句子的暫停,意思沒有結(jié)束:如果在兩個(gè)完整句子間不加任何標(biāo)點(diǎn)同樣使前后兩句粘連,這種稱為全粘連(fused sentence),我們把這兩種錯(cuò)誤統(tǒng)稱為粘連句(run-on sentence)。就是說一組S+V+complete idea沖入了另一組S+V+complete idea,中間沒有適當(dāng)?shù)姆蛛x,這種錯(cuò)誤使讀者產(chǎn)生混亂,因此是英文寫作的第一大忌。中國學(xué)生易犯此種錯(cuò)誤,一方面原因是中文寫作中標(biāo)點(diǎn)符號(hào)的使用比較隨意,再者中文的標(biāo)點(diǎn)與英文的用法上是有一定的不同;另一方面,國內(nèi)的英文課堂講寫作的課時(shí)也不是很多,也就難怪學(xué)生會(huì)出現(xiàn)這樣那樣的錯(cuò)了。
記得2002年下半年我們學(xué)院來了一位叫Frankie白的大陸學(xué)生。他是國內(nèi)某大企業(yè)的高級(jí)管理人員,他的托福和GMAT其他項(xiàng)分?jǐn)?shù)很高,但寫作不理想。Frankie的第一篇文章,沒有分?jǐn)?shù),老師只給了四句批語1.run-on sentences;2.faulty parallelism(不平行結(jié)構(gòu));3.sentence fragments(斷句);4.dangling modifiers(懸空修飾)。Frankie拿著作文來找我,說:你們這個(gè)老師沒教什么,也沒有幫我改正什么,只寫了這幾條評(píng)語,而且他也不知道這些評(píng)語是什么意思。為什么老師不講?我對(duì)他說,他犯的這幾種句子錯(cuò)誤,在母語為英語的國家從小學(xué)就開始介入,一直到中學(xué),貫穿整個(gè)英文學(xué)習(xí)過程,是英文高考必考語法項(xiàng)目,更是老師批改學(xué)生作文的一大原則。Frankie的例子是非常普遍的。我真誠地希望讀者能從這些例子里吸取一些有益的東西,對(duì)一些國外寫作的常規(guī)逐步熟悉。我們來看下面的句子:
Canada is a beautiful country,many inter-national students like studying there.
這個(gè)句子很多大陸學(xué)生會(huì)認(rèn)為是正確的句子,實(shí)際上是一個(gè)很典型的粘連句,是個(gè)錯(cuò)句。如果你的寫作里充滿了這樣的句子,即便你用了許多漂亮的詞匯,文章寫得多么有趣兒,也一定會(huì)丟很多分。這個(gè)句子最簡單的改法是把逗號(hào)變成句號(hào),也就是把一個(gè)錯(cuò)句變成兩個(gè)正確的句子:
Canada is a beantiful country. Many international students like studying there.
另外一種常見寫法是除逗號(hào)外再加一個(gè)連接詞:
Canada is a beautiful country,and many international students like studying there.
最后還可以用分號(hào)代替逗號(hào)把兩個(gè)完整句連起來,換句話說,分號(hào)可以獨(dú)立連接兩個(gè)完整句而逗號(hào)不行:
Canada is a beautiful country; many inter-national students like studying there.
下面我們做一點(diǎn)小練習(xí)。
試從下面句子中找出粘連句(run-on sentences):
1.Teaching is a hard job. Great efforts go into each 1esson.
2.Teachingis a hard job great efforts go into each 1esson.
3.Teachingis a hard job,great efforts go into each lesson.
上面練習(xí)1是兩個(gè)正確的句子,2是粘連句,3也是粘連句。你的答案和我一樣嗎?
上一部分我在最后給讀者留了一個(gè)錯(cuò)句,不知改正得如何??戳松厦孢@段講解應(yīng)該知道如何下手了。原句:
Before going to the grocery, you should make list if you make a habit of planning first, you will not buy unneeded items.這是很典型的粘連句,完全粘連型。兩個(gè)完整句中間沒有任何連接詞,是錯(cuò)的。最簡單的改法就是把兩個(gè)完整句用句號(hào)斷開,成為正確句。Before going to the grocery,you should make a list. If you make a habit of planning first, you will not buy unneeded items. 錯(cuò)句看起來簡單,具體應(yīng)用在寫作上,就不容易了。為了說明鞏固本部分所講的內(nèi)容,我們做幾個(gè)粘連句練習(xí),答案在本期內(nèi)找。
1.Since I never cook perhaps it would be wise not to try,it will make me bored.
2.Without my mom's love,I would giveup I did not.
3.A great number of Chinese students prefer to major in business, actually they do not have any interest in it.
4.Working hard,hepassed the test,his parents are pleased and relieved.
5.A1though I was tired,I tried to finish the article, my husband helped me proofread it.
6.If the claims by the manufacturer are true,I do not mind attempts to get me to buy a prodact,1 claims tend to anger me though.
(二)斷句或不完整句
本部分要講的是在國外英文寫作中,ESL學(xué)生包括母語是英語的學(xué)生常犯的第二類大錯(cuò):斷句或不完整句(sentence fragments)。所謂句子,簡單地說就是:主語+動(dòng)詞+完整意思。如果在寫作過程中,缺主語或缺動(dòng)詞或意思不完整,就會(huì)產(chǎn)生斷句錯(cuò)誤。斷句不但使句子艱澀難懂更會(huì)在寫作中失去很多分?jǐn)?shù)。下面就談?wù)剮追N常見的情況。
第一種情況:缺主語。例句:
1.Many Chinese people are becoming rich is obvious.
2.WalkonOak Street,Helen did not notice the bus loop.
例1中,動(dòng)詞is沒有主語。一個(gè)完整的句子是不能作主語的。這是個(gè)很典型的缺主語的斷句。對(duì)剛剛出國不久語感還不強(qiáng)的中國學(xué)生來講,通常都是靠簡單的中譯英來寫句子和文章;因而,這樣的句子就頻頻出現(xiàn),使寫作分?jǐn)?shù)大打折扣??筛臑椋篢hat many Chinese people are becoming rich is obvious.或者It isobvious that many Chinese people are becoming rich.
例2的情況比較復(fù)雜,動(dòng)詞walk沒有主語,但簡單 加一個(gè)主語,句子仍然是錯(cuò)的。She walked on Oak Street,Helen did not notice the bus loop.讀過上一部分就不難發(fā)現(xiàn),這是一個(gè)非常明顯的粘連句。正確的寫法是:When Helen walked on Oak Street,she did not notice the bus loop.或 Walking on Oak Street, Helen did not notice the bus loop.比較而言,第二句要好很多,但第一句不是錯(cuò)句,只是弱了些。
下面我們做幾個(gè)小練習(xí),識(shí)別一下剛講過的缺主語的斷句。
1.There are a lot of Indian people live in Vancouver.
2.My tutor is in the study,talking with my dad.
第一句是斷句,這是一句極為典型的中譯英錯(cuò)句:有很多印度人住在溫哥華。這樣直接翻譯過來的句子,因live這個(gè)動(dòng)詞沒有主語,造成錯(cuò)句。正確寫法是:There are a lot of Indian people living in Vancouver.或A lot of Indian people live in Vancouver.后一句讀起來要地道很多。第二句是正確的句子。
第二種情況:缺動(dòng)詞。例句:
1.The teacher helping me out of ESL class.
2.The issue debated.
3.She looks almost like her twin sister.The only difference being that she is a little taller.
例1中,主語teacher沒有動(dòng)詞,改法就是給句子加上動(dòng)詞,可改為:The teacher helping me out of ESL class is patient.這里沒有惟一答案,因?yàn)槊總€(gè)人要表達(dá)的意思不一樣,所用的動(dòng)詞就不一樣,但主語必須有動(dòng)詞,這是最重要的。
例2中,主語issue同樣也沒有動(dòng)詞,主語一定要有動(dòng)詞。可改為:The issue debated is controversial.或The issue debated is critical.不管怎樣,主語issue有了自己的動(dòng)詞,使要表達(dá)的句子完整,達(dá)到了交流的目的。
例3中,第一部分是正確句子,第二部分雖然有主語,有句號(hào),但是主語difference沒有動(dòng)詞,being是不能獨(dú)立作動(dòng)詞的。最簡單的改法是:第一部分不動(dòng),She looks almost like her twin sister;第二部分把being改成is,形成一個(gè)完整的句子。The only difference is that she is a little taller.或許有的寫作水平高一些的同學(xué)會(huì)把第一部分的句號(hào)換成逗號(hào),第二部分不動(dòng),只是將The only...變成the only...:She looks almost like her twin sister, the only difference being that she is a little taller.第二種寫法難度比較大,筆者認(rèn)為,作為初學(xué)寫作的同學(xué),不必急于嘗試寫這種句子,現(xiàn)階段只要能寫正確的句子就可以了。請(qǐng)大家再看幾個(gè)練習(xí):
1. I have two sisters, one living in China, and the other in Vancouver.
2.Theylooked at each other longingly. None of them speaking a word.
第一句是正確的句子,但第二句是斷句,正確寫法:They looked at ecach other longingly None of them spoke a word.或They looked at each other longingly , none of them speaking a word.
第三種情況:意思不完整。例句:
I enjoy the sunshine. Because it soothes my weary muscle.
很明顯,這是個(gè)錯(cuò)句。第一部分是正確的,而第二部分根本就不是一個(gè)完整的句子,盡管有主語和動(dòng)詞,但沒有完整意思,只是一個(gè)從句,所以不是完整句。正確寫法:I enjoy the sunshine because it soothes my weary muscle.這是一個(gè)主句加一個(gè)狀語從句?;蛘甙褟木渲械倪B接詞去掉,使之變成兩個(gè)完整的正確句子:I enjoy the sunshine.It soothes my weary muscle.這種情況的錯(cuò)誤通常都是很多同學(xué)在用由when,before,after,since,until,every time,once,because,as,if, unless,although等引導(dǎo)的狀語從句時(shí)出現(xiàn)的。避免這種類型錯(cuò)誤的簡單方法就是不要以狀語從句開始一句話,而是先寫主句再寫從句,等熟練以后確保不會(huì)犯斷句錯(cuò)誤時(shí),主句放前還是從句放前都沒關(guān)系,只要句子對(duì)。國外很多中學(xué)的英文老師為了防止學(xué)生犯這類錯(cuò)誤,開始只是告訴學(xué)生永遠(yuǎn)不要以Because開始句子。我們做幾個(gè)練習(xí)。
1.At the airport when I met him.
2.Angela did not give up.Thongh she knew she was on the wrong track.
這兩個(gè)句子都是斷句。
參考答案如下:
1.At the airporr when I met him he hugged me.
2.Angela did not give up though she knew she was on the wrong track.
有關(guān)斷句錯(cuò)誤我們就先到這里。總結(jié)如下:在英文寫作時(shí),每個(gè)句子都應(yīng)該有三大要素:主語、動(dòng)詞和完整意思;只要缺少一個(gè)要素,就犯了斷句錯(cuò)誤。為鞏固這一部分的內(nèi)容,希望大家能把下面的練習(xí)做一下,答案見本期。
1.Thefalltreesarelovely.Magnificent shades of golden red.
2.Children grow up in Canada are happy and carefree.
3. I am amazed at the new buildings.bUildings,on both sides of the street and in the lot behind the old shopping mall.
4.The girl looks beautiful.Long hair blowing in the wind.
5.The favorite spectator sport for Americans is football.While Europeans get excited about soccer.
6.You should go.Whether it deserves or not.
Warm up exericses :
1. She is pretty, smart and has a lot of money.
2.The new material is both lightly and remarkably strong.
(三)不平行結(jié)構(gòu)
我們先來看看上一節(jié)中的warm-up exercises:1.She is pretty,smart and has a lot of money.2.The new material is both lightly and remarkably strong.這兩句尤其第一句對(duì)很多ESL學(xué)生來講完全是個(gè)正確的句子,如果加拿大的寫作老師說是錯(cuò)的,很多同學(xué)會(huì)覺得老師是雞蛋里挑骨頭。第二句是一道托福真題,當(dāng)然是錯(cuò)的句子。這兩句到底錯(cuò)在哪兒了?這正是我們要講的不平行結(jié)構(gòu)(faulty parallelism)。
英語句子中將兩個(gè)或兩個(gè)以上的相同句子成分用并列連詞連接起來稱為并列結(jié)構(gòu),也稱平行結(jié)構(gòu)。組成平行結(jié)構(gòu)的可以是詞、詞組,或者從句。英文寫作要求平行結(jié)構(gòu)中各個(gè)部分必須采用相同的表達(dá)形式,否則就會(huì)犯失去平行的錯(cuò)誤。常見的連接平行結(jié)構(gòu)的連詞有:and,or,but,not,than;詞組有:not only...but also,either...or,neither...nor,both...and。這些詞和詞組看似簡單,卻不容易用對(duì)。但記住一條,很多錯(cuò)誤就可避免,即在使用這些詞尤其詞組時(shí),一定要保證這些連詞和詞組前后的句子成分一定平行。簡單講就是這些連詞或詞組前面的中心詞是什么詞性后面的中心詞就一定是相同詞性。比如前面是名詞那么后面也要名詞。例如:a girl and a boy.前面是形容詞后面一定是形容詞,例如:good but costly.前面是動(dòng)名詞,動(dòng)詞不定式,從句或句子,后面一定跟相同成分。例如:not only reading currents but also watching news on TV/either to dine out or to have a snack at home/The nanny does not know whether she has to quit the job or whether she has to stay just for money./Helen has much more money than does her boyfriend.
讀到這里,我們應(yīng)該知道開頭練習(xí)的答案了。在第一句中,and前面是形容詞,可后面卻是一個(gè)句子,是非常典型的不平行結(jié)構(gòu),應(yīng)改成:She is pretty,smart and rich.第二句就復(fù)雜一些,both后面是副詞,可and后面的中心詞是形容詞,顯然不平行,根據(jù)全句的意思,both和and后面都應(yīng)該是形容詞,所以,正確答案是:The new material is both light and remarkably strong.
在整體平行結(jié)構(gòu)中,and這個(gè)詞是最難辨認(rèn)的,所以也是最難正確使用的??梢哉f,and對(duì)ESL學(xué)生來說是最簡單的單詞,但是真的用起來是非常難把握的。很多讀者會(huì)覺得,有那么嚴(yán)重嗎?不要危言聳聽吧。讓我們先來做幾個(gè)平行結(jié)構(gòu)的練習(xí)再繼續(xù)討論。
1.Kurt started being on the rink at four years old,skating at six,and to play hockey at eight.
2.Jennifer's husband,Glen,is not only a romantic partner but quite resourceful as well.
3.Who can tell me how to do this efficiently and without any effort?
4.It is better to repeat a noun than making an ambiguous statement.
5.The style of the American poet Hilda Doolittle is characterized by a particular emphasis on the precise and object treatment of images.
在這五個(gè)練習(xí)里不完全都是錯(cuò)誤的句子,有一句是對(duì)的。是哪一句呢?我們逐句分析后,答案就出來了。
第一句里,and很明顯應(yīng)該連接的是started后面的三個(gè)動(dòng)名詞,而在錯(cuò)句里and前面有兩個(gè)動(dòng)名詞,being和skating,可后面就變成動(dòng)詞不定式to play了,因此導(dǎo)致了句子不平行,造成錯(cuò)句。應(yīng)改成:Kurt started being on the rink at four years old,skating at six,and playing hockey at eight.
第二句里,not only...but also,或not only... but...as well,或not only...but這幾個(gè)詞組要求平行。簡單講,not only后面的中心詞是什么詞性或什么句子成分,but (but also)后面的中心詞也應(yīng)該是一樣的。第二句中not only后面的中心詞是名詞partner,可是but后面的中心詞卻是形容詞resourceful,這是一個(gè)失去平行的錯(cuò)句。
很多中國學(xué)生在剛上英文寫作課時(shí),每次加拿大老師把作文發(fā)下來,只要用了上面這幾個(gè)詞組的同學(xué),極少有人用對(duì),多數(shù)人都有這樣的紅字批改:faulty parallelism。原因是他們確實(shí)不知道這是錯(cuò)誤。這也是國內(nèi)外英文寫作教學(xué)和學(xué)習(xí)側(cè)重點(diǎn)不同造成的。國內(nèi)英文寫作比較看重漂亮詞匯和詞組的使用,而國外英文寫作重視詞或詞組用得是否恰當(dāng),即比較看重整體性。不僅如此,嚴(yán)重的是要為此失去很多分?jǐn)?shù)。這就是為什么我們對(duì)剛到國外留學(xué)的學(xué)生反復(fù)強(qiáng)調(diào)盡量先寫簡單準(zhǔn)確的句子,經(jīng)過一段時(shí)間的海外英文學(xué)習(xí),結(jié)合國內(nèi)的知識(shí)就能寫出既漂亮又合乎國外英文寫作要求的句子或文章。真正有水準(zhǔn)的高分英文寫作絕不是停留在簡單準(zhǔn)確,更不是機(jī)械地堆積華麗詞語。用漂亮詞沒錯(cuò),關(guān)鍵是用對(duì)?;仡^再看第二句,雖然用了一個(gè)很好的詞組,可惜用錯(cuò)了。正確用法:Jennifer's husband,Glen,is not only a romantic partner but aresourceful man as well.
第三句比較而言會(huì)使剛接觸平行結(jié)構(gòu)的讀者上當(dāng)。這是個(gè)對(duì)的句子。為什么呢?這里就是上文所說的 and的難用之處。用and作簡單連接很容易,比如:Tom and Mary;smart and rich...但句子稍復(fù)雜一點(diǎn),很多同學(xué)就暈了??梢院敛豢鋸埖卣f,如果在閱讀尤其類似國外大學(xué)課本或托福閱讀材料時(shí),能準(zhǔn)確知道and到底連接的是什么,再難的文章也相對(duì)容易多了。在讀第三句時(shí)很多同學(xué)都覺得是錯(cuò)的,因?yàn)閍nd連接的是副詞efficiently而后面是介詞短語without any effort,表面看是錯(cuò)了,實(shí)際上and連接的是兩個(gè)平行的語法成分(狀語),所以是對(duì)的。
第四句里,要注意than的使用,這個(gè)詞所要連接的成分一定平行。在這句里,than后面是動(dòng)名詞making而前面沒有動(dòng)名詞,只有動(dòng)詞不定式to repeat a noun,所以失去平行。要達(dá)到平行,或把動(dòng)名詞改成動(dòng)詞不定式:It is better to repeat a noun than to make an am biguous statement.或把動(dòng)詞不定式改成動(dòng)名詞:It is better repeating a noun than making an ambiguous statement.
第五句是一道托福真題。托福文法部分的考點(diǎn)都是非?;镜模爬ㄆ饋泶蠹s十大類考點(diǎn),我這里講的四大句子錯(cuò)誤就是其中的四點(diǎn),尤其這里講的平行結(jié)構(gòu),不但必考無疑,而且占的比例非常大??吹谖寰渲衋nd連接誰,這并不難,應(yīng)該是兩個(gè)形容詞共同修飾名詞treatment,但現(xiàn)在and前面是形容詞precise,可后面不是形容詞而是名詞object,為使句子達(dá)到平行,也就是使句子正確,必須把名詞。objiect變成形容詞形式 objective,應(yīng)改為:The style of American poet Hilda Doolittle is characterized by a practical emphasis on the precise andobjective treatment of images.
下面簡單總結(jié)一下這部分內(nèi)容。在英文寫作中,當(dāng)使用連詞and,but,or,not還有than時(shí)一定要記住用平行結(jié)構(gòu),關(guān)鍵是連接什么;另外用詞組not only...but also,either...or,both...and,neither...nor時(shí)更要注意句子結(jié)構(gòu)的平行,如果拿不準(zhǔn),建議最好不用,不用總比錯(cuò)用要好得多。為鞏固這部分內(nèi)容,我們做幾個(gè)練習(xí):答案本期內(nèi)找。
1.There is a great difference between learning knowledge and to apply.
2.Wanting to accomplish something and if you actually accomplish it may not be the same thing.
3.It is what you do,not saying it,that counts.
4.Peter enjoyed chatting with Elsa, listening to her complaints,and to give her suggestion.
5.A kiln(干燥爐) is a furnace used to dry,cure,hard,or melt many kinds of materials.
6.Summer has more friends than me.
7.He jogs to lose weight,stay healthy,and it is fun.
Warm-up exercises:
1. Meeting her only once, she enchanted him completely.
2.To go to university in Canada, TOEFL has to be tested.
(四)懸空修飾
讓我們來看看ESL學(xué)生在英文寫作中最容易犯的最后一種錯(cuò)誤(danghng modiher懸空修飾)。這種錯(cuò)誤是非常普遍的,尤其是在寫英文作文時(shí),習(xí)慣逐句把中文硬翻譯成英文后再下筆的同學(xué)更易犯這種錯(cuò)誤。比如這樣一個(gè)句子,“要上美國和加拿大的公立大學(xué)得考托?!?。這句話中文講得通,但用英文來表達(dá)時(shí),問題就出來了,很多中國學(xué)生都會(huì)寫成To attend university in both America and Canada,TOEFL has to be tested.這個(gè)句子看上去似乎沒錯(cuò),實(shí)際上是個(gè)錯(cuò)句。為什么呢?
在英文寫作中,一個(gè)完整的句子前面,有修飾成份是司空見慣的,但問題往往就出在修飾成份上。作為修飾成份它一定要有所修飾,換句話說就是要有自己的主語(完整的狀語從句)或邏輯主語(省略后的狀語從句)。如果省略后的狀語從句的邏輯主語不是主句的主語,就犯了懸空修飾的錯(cuò)誤。我們來看剛才的這個(gè)例句,主句TOEFLl has to be tested前面的動(dòng)詞不定式應(yīng)該是修飾成份,但這個(gè)動(dòng)詞不定式修飾誰呢?按現(xiàn)在的寫法是修飾TOEFL,可是邏輯上講不通,因?yàn)橹挥腥瞬拍苌洗髮W(xué),才能發(fā)出attend這個(gè)動(dòng)作,而 TOEFL不是人也根本發(fā)不出這個(gè)動(dòng)作。簡單講就是attend的邏輯主語不可能是TOEFL,所以句子是錯(cuò)的。正確的改法有兩個(gè):1.把主句的主語變成人,任何人稱都可以,只要能發(fā)出attend這個(gè)動(dòng)作就可以,比如,To attend university in both American and Canada,many international students have to take the TOEFL test. 2.把動(dòng)詞不定式還原為狀語從句,使attend有自己的主語,從而使整個(gè)句子邏輯通順,If international students want to attend university in both America and Canada.TOEFL has to be taken.比較而言,第一句要比第二句自然地道很多,但第二句也是個(gè)正確的句子。
讀了上面的例句及解釋,我們上一節(jié)的warm-up練習(xí)2就有了答案。原句:To go to university in Canada,TOEFL has to be tested.應(yīng)改為:To go to university in Canada,many foreign students have to take the TOEFL test.或If foreign students want to go to university in Canada,many of them have to take the TOEFL test.既然這種錯(cuò)誤是稱為懸空修飾,很明顯,充當(dāng)修飾語的那個(gè)部分很重要。一個(gè)主句的前面要是有修飾成份,除了完整的狀語從句外(完整狀語從句不會(huì)引發(fā)懸空修飾錯(cuò)誤,這里講的主句修飾成份不包括完整狀語從句)還有什么樣的結(jié)構(gòu)來充當(dāng)修飾成份呢?
上文的例子里,修飾語是動(dòng)詞不定式,除此之外比較常見的是現(xiàn)在分詞和過去分詞短語(doing/done)、介詞短語、形容詞或形容詞短語,最后是名詞短語。名詞短語放句首作修飾很不容易用對(duì),也是托??荚囍械目键c(diǎn),如果不從懸空修飾的角度理解很難答對(duì)題目。下面分別舉例分析:
一、現(xiàn)在分詞短語作修飾語可能帶來的懸空修飾錯(cuò)誤。Finishing dinner,the table was cleaned.這句顯然錯(cuò)了,table不可能發(fā)出finishing這個(gè)動(dòng)作,也就是說finishing的邏輯主語不是table,所以出現(xiàn)錯(cuò)誤。應(yīng)改為:1.Finishing dinner,mom cleaned the table.或 2.When we finished dinner,the table was cleaned.這個(gè)例句讀完,前一節(jié)的warm-up 練習(xí)就有了答案。原句:Meeting her only once,she enchanted him completely.應(yīng)改成:Meeting her only once,he was enchanted by her completely.
二、過去分詞短語作修飾語可能帶來的懸空修飾錯(cuò)誤。Made in China,Rebecca bought a Beijing jeep.這個(gè)句子里,made是過去分詞,是被動(dòng)態(tài),修飾誰呢?好像是Rebecca,但根據(jù)句子的意思,Rebecca不可能被made,人只能說born,這樣made就沒有什么可修飾的了;也就是說made的邏輯主語不是主句的主語Rebecca,這樣寫的結(jié)果就是修飾語沒有自己的邏輯主語,沒有什么可修飾的,懸空在那里,造成錯(cuò)誤。應(yīng)改成:Rebecca bought a Beinjing jeep made in China.
三、介詞短語放在句首作修飾語可能帶來的懸空修飾錯(cuò)誤。At the age of three,her mom sent her to the music school.很多中國學(xué)生在剛看此句時(shí)都覺得是對(duì)的,因?yàn)榉g成中文也挺順口的:三歲時(shí),媽媽就送她去音樂學(xué)校了。這個(gè)英文句子現(xiàn)在的寫法意思是:When her mom was three years old,her mom sent her to the music school.如果這樣寫笑話都出來了,哪里有三歲的媽媽?應(yīng)改成1.At the age of three, she was sent to the music school by her mom.2.WhenShewas at the age of three,her mom sent her to the music school.
四、形容詞或形容詞短語作修飾語可能帶來的懸空修飾錯(cuò)誤。Very expensive,my mom did not buy me the pants.很明顯,expensive不可能修飾my mom,按以上寫法,懸空修飾的錯(cuò)誤就出來了。應(yīng)改成:Very expensive,the pants were not bought by my mom.
五、名詞在句首作修飾語可能帶來的懸空修飾錯(cuò)誤。A beautiful city,many tourists favour Vancouver.這里名詞city應(yīng)該是指Vancouver,可現(xiàn)在這樣寫,就變成city在修飾many people了,這顯然不合邏輯。因?yàn)閏ity的邏輯主語不是也不可能是tourists,因?yàn)閏ity不是人。如果不動(dòng)前面的名詞,應(yīng)改成:A beautiful city, Vancouver is favoured by many tourists.
總結(jié)一下上面的內(nèi)容:1:任何一個(gè)主句前都經(jīng)常會(huì)有修飾成份,不論修飾成分是動(dòng)詞不定式或動(dòng)詞不定式短語、現(xiàn)在分詞或過去分詞短語、介詞短語、形容詞或形容詞短語、名詞及名詞短語,不管修飾成份由什么充當(dāng)(完整狀語從句除外),這個(gè)修飾語一定要修飾主句的主語,必須要有邏輯關(guān)系,否則就會(huì)出現(xiàn)懸空修飾的錯(cuò)誤。下面做幾個(gè)練習(xí)鞏固一下:
1.At home,the live show can be watched on TV.
2.Ifwateredtwice a week,grandma will grow a good garden.
3. Standing on the sundeck,the beautiful stars are twinkling.
4.While a child,my parents often took me to the beach.
5.When ready,take the meat out ofthe oven imaediately.
6.To get good scores,more exercises have to be done.
上面的6句都是錯(cuò)的,逐句分析一下:
1.介詞短語類??筛某桑篈t home,the kids can watch the live show on TV
2.過去分詞類??筛某桑篒f watered twice a week,a good garden will be grown by grandma.
3.現(xiàn)在分詞類??筛某桑篠tanding on the sundeck,my daughter observed the beautiful tars twinkling.或Whenhewasstandingonthe sundeck,my daughter observed the beautiful stars twinkling.
4.名詞類。可改成:While a child,I was often taken to the beach by my parents.或When I was a child,my parents often took me to the beach.
5.形容詞類。可改成:When ready,the meat has to be taken out of the oven immediately.或 When the meat is ready, take it out of the oven immediately.
6.動(dòng)詞不定式類。可改成:To get good scores,students have to do more exercises.或If students want to get good scores, more exercises have to be done.
我們的練習(xí)是請(qǐng)大家用已經(jīng)給出的修飾成份,寫一個(gè)基本主句使之與修飾部分呼應(yīng),避免懸空修飾。(答案見本期)
1.Having grown up in the 1960s,_______.
2.Toreceivepermission for a field trip,_________.
3.If properly frozen, _________.
4. By mowing the grass infrequently and cutting it high,__________.
5. When riding on a train, _________.
6. In the elevator, _________.
7. To understand Shakespeare, _________.
8. Before I graduate, _________.
9. Upon entering the twelfth grade, _________.
10. Tied securely to the tree, _________.
三、英文寫作常見四大句子錯(cuò)誤回顧
我們 已經(jīng)把國外英語學(xué)習(xí)與教學(xué)過程中最基本、最重要,也是很多中國大陸學(xué)生忽視或者根本沒有意識(shí)到的英文寫作四大句子錯(cuò)誤講完了。為了加深印象,溫故而知新,讓我們一起來通過例句總體回顧一下這幾種錯(cuò)誤句型:
一、Runa-on Senteace(粘連句):在英文寫作中,兩個(gè)完整的句子如果不是用并列連接詞連接就要依靠標(biāo)點(diǎn)符號(hào),要么句號(hào)要么分號(hào),絕不能用逗號(hào)或者什么標(biāo)點(diǎn)符號(hào)都不用,這樣就會(huì)造成粘連句。
例1 Vancouver is a beautiful city,I enjoy the life here.(逗號(hào)引起的粘連)
例2 The Hip-Hop recital is sensational everyone has a wonderful time.(兩個(gè)完整句中間沒有標(biāo)點(diǎn)符號(hào)造成的粘連句)
二、SenteaceFragments (斷句或不完整句):一個(gè)完整的句子最基本的要素就是主語+動(dòng)詞+完整意思,其中缺少任何一個(gè)要素都會(huì)造成斷句或不完整句。
例1 They looked at each other. None of them speaking anything.(缺動(dòng)詞造成的斷句)
例2 There are many Chinese people live in Vancouver.(缺主語造成的斷句,動(dòng)詞live沒有自己的主語)
例3 Because his proposal is declined.(缺少完整意思的斷句)
三、Faulty Parallelism(不平行結(jié)構(gòu)):英語句子中將兩個(gè)或兩個(gè)以上的相同句子成分用并列連詞連起來稱為并列結(jié)構(gòu)或平行結(jié)構(gòu)。組成平行結(jié)構(gòu)的可以是詞、詞組或從句。英文寫作中,要求平行結(jié)構(gòu)中各個(gè)部分必須采用相同的表達(dá)形式,否則就會(huì)犯失去平行的錯(cuò)誤。
例1 She is pretty,smart and has a lot of money.(這里and應(yīng)該連接三個(gè)平行的形容詞,但這句子里and卻把兩個(gè)形容詞和一個(gè)動(dòng)詞連接起來,造成不平行)
例2 There is a great diffierence between dining out and to have a snack at home. (動(dòng)名詞短語dining out和動(dòng)詞不定式短語to have a snack不平行)
四、Dangling Modifier(懸空修飾):在英文寫作中,一個(gè)完整的句子前面,有修飾成分是常見的。作為修飾成分它一定要有所修飾。換句話說,就是要有自己的主語(完整的狀語從句的主語)或邏輯主語 (省略后的狀語從句的邏輯主語)。如果省略后的狀語從句的邏輯主語不是主句的主語,就犯了懸空修飾的錯(cuò)誤。
例1 Meeting her only once,she enchanted him completely.(Meeting的邏輯主語不是she,所以出現(xiàn)懸空)
例2 To meet the requirement,LPI(Linux認(rèn)證考試)has to be tested.(To meet的邏輯主語不是LPI,形成懸空修飾)
我們簡單地回顧了四大基本寫作錯(cuò)誤。下面來看國內(nèi)一名普通的高中畢業(yè)生剛進(jìn)入加拿大的學(xué)校學(xué)習(xí)時(shí)寫的一篇文章。文章中有四大錯(cuò)誤的一種或幾種,讀一讀,看是否能把這些錯(cuò)找出來。
1)There are some people think knowledge gained from experience. 2)Other peoplerefuse thisopinion, saidthesource which gained from books is more important. I think both of them are important.
Knowledge gained from experience is absolutely correct. When a baby is born, 3)does he/she learning something from book?The answer is no because he does not know alphabet, 4)he even cannot call his parents. 5)How he to learn. Eating, speaking, smile, and so on. That is gained from their experience and not from book. Second, where does the book come from? That is from author.6)How the author to write the book.The answer is from his experience. Therefore, I think, if people do not have experiences, they will not create any knowledge, so experience is more important.
Nevertheless, learning from books is a shortcut toward some people. Creating knowledge should take much time, so the knowledge which is discovered will be written in a book by author.When people want to learn the knowledge,they do not need spend too much time, and just find a book which is written. Anyway, 7)book is not neither good nor reason.
Finally, I think that should not stop us from looking for quicklines along the way. Which way is correct? Nobody can give the exact answer. 8)Such as nobody is same as somebody. 9)Therefore, choosing a way which is suit to oneself is absolutely practical.
參考答案
“粘連句”參考答案:
1.Since I never cook perhaps it would be wise not to try. It will make me bored. /Since I never cook perhaps it would be wise not to try or it will make me bored.
2. Without my mom's love, I would give up. I did not ./ Without my mom's love, I would give up but I did not .
3. A great number of Chinese students prefer to major in business. Actually they do not have any interest in it.
4. Working hard, he passed the test. His parents are pleased and relieved./ Working hard, he passed the test, and his parents are pleased and relieved.
5.Although I was tired, I tried to finish the article. My husband helped me proofread it.
6. If the claims by the manufacturer are true, I do not mind attempts to get me to buy a product. False claims tend to anger me though. /If the claims by the manufacture are true, I do not mind attempts to get me to buy a product, but 1 claims tend to anger me though.
“斷句或不完整句”參考答案:
1. The fall trees are lovely with magnificent shades of golden red.
2. Children growing up in Canada are happy and carefree.
3. I am amazed at the new buildings on both sides of the street and in the lot behind the old shopping mall.
4. The girl looks beautiful with long hair blowing in the wind.
5. The favorite spectator sport for Americans is football while Europeans get excited about soccer.
6.You should go whether it deserves or not.
“不平行結(jié)構(gòu)”參考答案:
1. There is a great difference between learning knowledge and applying it.或There is a great difference between to learn knowledge and to apply it.
2. Wanting to accomplish something and actually haveing accomplished it may not be the same thing.
3. It is what you do, not what you say, that counts.
4. Peter enjoyed chatting with Elsa, listening to her complaints, and giving her suggestions.
5. A kiln is a furnace used to dry, cure, harden or melt many kinds of materials.
6. Summer has more friends than I do.或Summer has more friends than do I.
7. He jogs to lose weight, stay healthy, and have fun.
“懸空修飾”參考答案:
1. Having grown up in the 1960s, my sisters are familiar with the movie.
2. To receive permission for a field trip, the teacher sent out the form.
3. If properly frozen, strawberries can keep good for quite a while.
4. By mowing the grass infrequently and cutting it high, the gardener does not come to the house very often.
5. The little girl screamed when riding on a train.
6. In the elevator, Cindy met Dr. Ben.
7. To understand Shakespeare, read his plays.
8. Before I graduate, TELUS(加拿大第二大電話公司)offers me a volunteer job in which I am quite interested.
9. Upon entering the twelfth grade, Angela starts staying up late.
10. Tied securely to the tree, the little pony looks hopeless.